Hug Your Baby

New Certified HUG Teacher Shares Her Story: Parents discover their own SOSs!

2012-01-10T10:30:00.001-05:00

Ellynne Skove is a therapist and movement specialist focusing on somatic practices and birth psychology in New York. She developed the GoGo Babies classes teaching Developmental Movement, Tummy Time, & Baby Yoga for new parents and their babies to help parents understand the importance of movement in a babies physical, mental, and emotional growth. Bonding and attachment are of special interest to Ellynne as well, and she works with this from pre-conception through the pregnancy, birth, and beyond, especially with babies conceived through Assisted Reproductive technologies. For more information see: GoGo Babies or True North Wellness.

As a Movement therapist and developmental movement specialist working in the field of pre and perinatal psychology and health I am very interested in helping all members of the family who are bringing a new baby into the world.

While teaching my first HUG class I overheard a father whispering to himself about his own S.O.S. (signs of over stimulation) behavior. Upon hearing this I quickly added to our post video discussion a query to all of the adults about their own S.O.S.’s. The couples began to tease one another and laugh, along with expressing frustration about when a spouse becomes “unavailable.” Of course we all deal with our own over stimulation or too much stress by Spacing Out, Shutting Down, or Switching Off. There may be many other ways we do this too.

Since having a baby can be such an enormous change for many couples, and often there is not enough support for new families, I now always ask my parents in class to identify their S.O.S. behaviors. Naming these behaviors can be really helpful to the parents. Becoming conscious can help the person who might be overly stressed ask for what he or she needs, and it can certainly help others in the family give more patience, support, and understanding.

Since the adult caregivers in a family need to be able to address the needs of their children and babies it is also extremely useful to ask the parents what feels nurturing, supportive, and helpful when they are overly stressed. In somatic trauma healing work we call this being “Re-Sourced.” It is when we feel more centered and grounded in our beings, physically, emotionally, and mentally. More present and in our “Ready Zone.” Sometimes it might be a cup of tea or a bath. For a new mother, it might be just finding a way to get to the bathroom without having to worry about the baby. For others it might be going for a walk, or to a yoga class. Perhaps having time to complete a task without interruption, or taking a nap.

Whatever it is, it is wonderful for the new parents to identify these ReSources and remember them, much as we encourage them to use swaddling, swaying, sshhhhing sounds, and sucking as ReSources for their new babies. Understanding that all humans, especially in our busy multi tasking societies, go through “Rebooting” is really important. Finding ways to help brings the family closer and creates deeper bonds and attachment for all.

Are Baby Boys Tougher than Baby Girls?

2012-01-05T09:17:00.000-05:00

“Be tough little man,” I hear as I draw up the two-month-olds immunizations. Do we (as a culture) expect boy babies to handle stress more easily than their two-month-old twin sister? Some moms and many dads might find themselves saying, “Yes we do!” This new study gives us reason to pause,. A meta-analysis of 69 studies involving almost 6,000 children indicates that boys who are more insecurely attached to their mothers in the early years have more behavior problems later in childhood.

© HUG Your Baby 2012

CAPPA offers first Doula/Childbirth Educator Training In Mexico

2011-12-01T14:36:00.006-05:00

The November CAPPA Newsltter shares the exciting news that CAPPA is reaching out to colleagues in Mexico. Twelve women from a variety of backgrounds came together in Guadalajara, Mexico to learn skills and techniques for supporting women and their families during this vulnerable and exciting time in their lives. CAPPA leadership from Equador, Jennifer Bertha, lead this workshop.

Let's celebrate the importance of education and support for young families around the world! And, remember to remind your Spanish speaking educators that the HUG Your Baby DVD is now available in Spanish.

"Nursing Mother's Companion"

2011-11-03T06:15:00.002-04:00

"Kathleen Huggins lays a vast spectrum of early worries and questions to rest in an easy-to-read, factual, and yet not overly-clinical book. Every breastfeeding mother, and especially every new mom who wonders "Is this normal? Is this okay? What can I do about this?" should have this book on her shelf - or better yet, beside her bed or rocking chair for easy access."

Read story here.

Creating Healthy Connections: Nurturing Brain Development

2011-10-30T20:09:00.004-04:00

Zero-to-Three offers exciting podcast about how baby's learn. Download this podcast, and hear Dr Alison Gopnik, Ph.D. author of Philosophical Baby. Take a walk, enjoy the Fall season and learn how much babies know.

Infant Massage USA now Recommends HUG Your Baby Training for ALL its Members!

2011-10-27T14:19:00.007-04:00

Linda Storm, executive director of Infant Massage USA, has a lot to say about how The HUG will enhance the work of the professionals in her organization. (See video.) As she explains, "infant massage is NOT something we do TO THE BABY, but instead, something we do WITH THE BABY." Understanding and responding to a baby's SOSs (Signs of Over-Stimulation) and appreciating a baby's movement from one Zone to another is crucial for effective infant massage. Linda believes HUG Your Baby training will help their professionals increase a parent's sensitivity to their baby and facilitate the parent-child relationship.

Join me in welcoming these professionals who serve young families in a very special way in our communities!

New Certified HUG Teacher shares story:Family SOS Identification and Family Soothing through Re-Sourcing

2011-10-24T09:08:00.010-04:00

New Certified HUG Teacher Returns from Napal

2011-10-23T14:20:00.005-04:00

Phyllis R. D'Agostino has been a doula (certified through DONA) and a parent educator for many years in Winston-Salem, Forsyth County, North Carolina. Last year she had the opportunity to accompany her husband, Steve, to work in Nepal. She has now returned to Winston-Salem, North Carolina where she will be starting a business as a birth/postpartum doula and teaching parenting and childbirth education classes for individuals, for local agencies and in the community.

I love the H.U.G. program! Every new parent should see this DVD before they leave the hospital if they haven’t seen it in a prenatal parenting or childbirth class. I have been using it since 2007 when I first attended a workshop conducted by Jan Tedder in Charlotte. I bought the HUG DVD, and began showing it in the prenatal parenting class I taught at the Forsyth County Department of Public Health where I worked at the Parent Education and Infant Mortality Reduction Program Coordinator. I also give it to every friend and relative of childbearing age; and clients I work with as a birth or postpartum doula.

While teaching the infant development class in the prenatal parenting series, I would show the HUG video instead of talking about what to look for in newborn development – it seemed that understanding infant cues and knowing infant stages of awareness were really important information for all parents and caregivers to know. Another great part of the HUG video is that parents learn strategies to help calm and sooth their baby. Feedback on class evaluations and conversations with participants were always very positive, and the parents were excited about what they had learned. I remember a couple who were attending a parenting series who were pregnant with their third child. The parents both said, “We wish we had learned about HUG with our first two children.”

H.U.G. – the Help, Understand and Guide Your Baby DVD is a remarkable education program and an invaluable tool for me as a doula and parent educator.

New Certified HUG Teacher Understands: Tired, but Determined!

2011-10-16T13:15:00.005-04:00

Karen Corbin is a new Certified HUG Teacher! She has worked with the California WIC program for 26 years and knows the challenges of being a new mom and dad. Karen will include her HUG skills in her classes for parents with newborns up to one year of age.

As I entered the home I had seen an all too familiar face of exhaustion. The family I was about to encounter had just moved from their own home into the home of the mother in law. Although, very receiving of her son’s family to include two boys and a two week old baby girl, to downsize and live with family members can be very difficult.

Raelyn is Joanna’s long awaited baby girl born at 40 weeks gestation. This is her 3rd delivery but this time labor and delivery was a fast 30 minute unmediated birth. Breastfeeding was difficult from the beginning with little experience, but Joanna was determined to breastfeed this time.

After learning and giving Raelyn time with suck training, Joanna felt she was well on her way. Joanna was recovering fast, had gotten thru the move and now baby was eating better, at this point mom’s thinking was that her exhaustion was normal, and some exhaustion was expected after all she had been thru a lot in the last two weeks.

“She’s awake and eats all the time” Joanna explained as we sat down, she points to her baby sleeping. “I just got her to sleep”.

Raelyn was in a deep sleep, no body movement, regular breathing, not easily awakened, not even with all the activity going on around her.

“Lets continue to keep an eye on baby, as I start the Understanding the Secret Language of a Newborn training”.

We were about 10 minutes into the training when Raelyn started some body wiggles, eyes began to open and shut, and some sucking movements with her lips. Joanna stopped what we were doing and went over and picked up baby and began to pat on the back, for her to return to sleep. “See what I mean, she hasn’t’ been a sleep long”. Baby’s skin color turned redder, and her movement increased with more squirming of her arms and legs. Her breathing is becoming more irregular until she begins to cry, and mama puts her to the breast, where she falls back to sleep.

Joanna is unfamiliar with infant sleeping cycles. All babies have two sleep cycle deep/still sleep and light active sleep. Deep still sleep is when baby’s body is still, breathing is deep, and makes no sound. Light active sleep is when the body wiggles, hands and legs might jerk, eyes can flash open, and maybe some baby sounds. Baby appears to be awake, but is still asleep. All babies go between these two cycles a number of times night and day.

As we continued with the training, baby Raelyn once again minutes later started with the light sleep activity, but this time Joanna watched her body and facial movements as baby went back into a deep sleep state. Joanna states “see if I hadn’t known about the sleep cycles I would have picked her back up”.

Parent-Baby Bonding and New Certified HUG Teacher

2011-10-16T13:05:00.005-04:00

JoAnna Laspesa, CCCE, is a CAPPA trained labor doula and certified childbirth educator at the Atlanta Baby Bump in Buford, GA. You can learn more about JoAnna and her classes at her website.
As a mother, parent-baby bonding is a topic especially close to my heart. Completing the HUG teacher training gave me many opportunities to reflect on my own experiences with my children when they were babies. HUG stands for Help, Understanding, Guidance for young families. If I had access to the HUG methods when my children were babies, I would have been more confident in my abilities as a mother and I would have been more aware of the bonds I had already formed with my child. I would've been able to recognize when my son was exhibiting SOS - Signs of Over-Stimulation.

Most women imagine that they will love and bond with their child instantly, but it is impossible to know exactly what your feelings will be towards your new baby. With increasing cases of postpartum depression related to not feeling a close connection with a new baby, sharing HUG methods will provide mothers with knowledge to help bolster their parenting and nurturing abilities.

I look forward to having the opportunity to share these teachings with expecting families. I especially want to share this information with women who may be struggling with adjusting to motherhood. Be it single moms, young mothers, or women who have come from a bad home situation - everyone can benefit from learning about HUG. It can change the course of your and your baby's lives for the better.

I am grateful that HUG exists today. I am hopeful that the more people learn about HUG, the more we'll be able to improve families from generation to generation.

Certified HUG Teacher Educates Parents about SIDS

2011-10-13T14:41:00.005-04:00

Pam Mckimie in Daphine, Alabama makes use of today's technology to prevent infant death. Share this important youtube video with the moms and dads you serve!

"Happiest Baby" VS Hug Your Baby

2011-10-11T07:18:00.000-04:00

When I speak with parenting and childbirth professionals, I am often asked how HUG Your Baby is similar to, or different from, the work of Dr. Harvey Karp, creator of The Happiest Baby on the Block.

Certainly, Dr. Karp has contributed much, over decades, to parents around the world. In addition to his work as a pediatrician, he has developed popular educational materials that address common concerns of new parents. "What does it mean when my baby cries?" "What can I do to help my fussy baby?" "Am I a bad parent because I can't calm my baby?" Attention to the fact that babies need lots of care (the "Fourth Trimester") and offering the catchy "Five Ss" approach to calming a babyare ideas that have helped parents near and far. The title of his work (and book) speaks to parents' overriding desires to have a happy, content baby. What's more, Dr.Karp is a dynamic and effective teacher. For all these good reasons, childbirth educators, doulas, and nurses around the country have studied his material as they strive to help the parents they serve. Without a doubt, he and his trainees have helped many parents.

Unfortunately, recent research published in The Journal of the American Board of Family Medicine demonstrates that simply showing The Happiest Baby on the Block video to parents does not reduce the amount of time a baby spends crying, increase parental sleep, nor decrease parental stress.

HUG Your Baby is different from Dr. Karp's work in three important ways.

Similar to Dr. Karp, HUG Your Baby deals directly with issues around crying.

First, HUG Your Baby gives parents skills to recognize an upset baby BEFORE crying occurs. We do this by teaching moms and dads to see "what 'Zone' their baby is in" ("Resting, Ready, or Rebooting Zone") and "when their baby 'Sends out an SOS' - Sign of Over-Stimulation". When parents learn to identify a baby's "Zone" and to recognize "Body and Behavioral SOSs," they can comfort their baby before she escalates into a fretful cry.

Second, HUG Your Baby works to support babies as they learn the important task of "self-regulation." Self regulation is a baby's increasing ability to calm down in order to respond effectively to the world around them. That's why HUG Your Baby recommends that parents acquire "T.O. DO" skills. First, "T" - Talk to calm the baby. Parents will see that some babies respond simply to a parent's voice. "O"- Observe a baby's efforts to contribute to their own calming (bringing his hand to his mouth, smacking his lips, or using the fencing reflex). And, then take the "DO" actions similar to those described through the years by Dr. Karp and other medical and child development experts (e.g., swaddling, swaying, or offering the breast or finger to suck).

Third, HUG Your Baby is not just interested in helping a parent learn to calm her baby. The HUG employs "Zone" and "SOS" information to help a baby breastfeed successfully, sleep well, and interact effectively with her mom and dad.

There are lots of babies in the world; therefore, there exists a great need to support all the parents who love these babies deeply. So, I am happy when I hear that parents and babies are happy - happy whether they find that peaceful place through the work of Dr. Karp or through HUG Your Baby's approach!

Happy Neonatal Nurses Day!

2011-09-16T10:42:00.008-04:00

Maryam Mozafari, one of our Certified HUG Teachers, reminded me that today is Neonatal Nurses Day. Here is a story to celebrate the amazing work you do and the power of HUG Your Baby in this challenging environment. We send out our thanks and great admiration for the difference you make in the lives of these vulnerable babies and their parents!

The baby seems tiny to these new parents standing in the NICU. Alexa and Albert were not expecting their baby for six more weeks. He was now in this Newborn Intensive Care Unit, hooked up to various beeping machines, long thin tubes, and shiny gadgets. Though the doctors were saying that little Fredi would be home in a few weeks, Mom and Dad could hardly imagine this. "How could we ever know what to do without the nurses to run all the machines!" Alexa declared.

Sarah had been a NICU nurse for twenty years. She had witnessed the amazing ability of medical technology to contribute to keeping babies alive and eventually sent home healthy. Interestingly, she had noted a worrisome tendency in both staff and parents in these units - to watch the machines more than the baby. Her job was to increase her unit's sensitivity to how much a tiny baby can communicate about himself.

If the NICU lights were suddenly turned up, little Fredi sent his hand up in a "salute" as if to cover his eyes. Beeping of the machine beside him would cause Fredi's face to turn pale and the tip of his nose to go almost white. Having his temperature checked and his diaper changed could cause his heart rate to go up and his breathing to increase. He might arch his back, hyper-extend his legs, and jerk his arm outward. A hand which had been resting almost in a grasp would suddenly splay open.

Fredi is smart. He can talk with his body, and his parents quickly learned to read this important language. The NICU staff "clustered" his care so that he could rest longer between activitie. Mom held him Kangaroo style on her chest so that he could sleep deeper, and everyone learned to speak quieter and less often around his isolette. Premie babies who are cared for in this "developmentally appropriate" way gain weight faster, have less slowing of their heartbeat, leave the NICU sooner, and have fewer long-term consequences of coming into this world a bit too soon.

Learning to watch their baby instead of the machine gave Alexa and Albert just the confidence they needed. Four weeks later they left the hospital with a healthy baby, nursing well, and well on his way to claiming his spot as the new prince of the family.

© HUG Your Baby 2011

Newborn help to the Rescue!

2011-09-09T00:16:00.009-04:00

Celebrate a Victory! Article from Nicole Frens, Certified HUG Teacher is Fresh off the Press! This article was published in the Estes Park Trail Gazette on (Friday September 2nd).

"Understanding newborn behavior and knowing how to soothe a newborn are keys to confident parenting. Nicole Frens recently became certified with the HUG Your Baby organization (Help, Understanding, Guidance for young families) and is offering classes through the hospital. HUG Your Baby is a program to help parents of infants learn how to read their baby’s cues and know how best to respond. All babies are unique, and this program teaches how to understand a baby’s special ways, giving parents critical skills on how to establish good feeding and sleeping habits for their baby, how to soothe their baby, and how to play with and appreciate their baby’s talents and abilities from the day they’re born.

“It was sort of like a Reece’s Peanut Butter Cup situation,” Nicole says, “I was taking continuing education classes to keep up with my Lamaze certification and ran across one study that showed what parents wish they’d learned in their childbirth education class – they wanted more info on being a parent. That made sense to me. Giving birth, though a very important time that can set you up for confident parenting, or not so much, only lasts for about one day. Parenting itself? Guh. Buh buh buh buh,” laughs the mom of 4 and 6 year old kids. “Then I read about the HUG program, which had all of this amazing “Geez I wished I’d known all that when my kids were infants” type information, and I thought to myself “there it is! The Answer!” I put the two ideas together, realized it had to be and got myself certified with HUG. I’ve made teaching about parenting a much bigger focus in my childbirth classes ever since.”

A fan of The Happiest Baby on the Block (HBB) methods for soothing a baby, Nicole says that the HUG program dovetails with it perfectly, providing a much broader insight about newborn behavior. “When I teach the HUG information, I also teach the 5 S’s (from HBB). My sanity was saved with the 5 S’s when my oldest was an infant, I can only imagine how much better off I would have been if I’d known the HUG information, too!”
One of the more amusing bits of information Nicole learned while training with HUG was about the ‘fencing pose’. Newborns will sometimes bend one arm and one leg while extending the other arm out straight (looking like they’re holding a sword perhaps) and looking down that arm. That’s the ‘you’re stressing me out –stop it with whatever you’re doing right now!’ pose. Looking back over her kids’ baby pictures she found evidence of the fencing pose and remembers that that particular photo session ended in a total meltdown. And all along her baby had been ‘telling’ her to stop. “Babies try to soothe themselves in ways that aren’t obvious to us,” Nicole says. “Personally, I’ve tried the fencing pose and it does nothing for me,” she jokes, “but recognizing when your baby is trying to soothe himself – and helping him accomplish that – can be the difference between a 20 minute crying jag, and peace and harmony.”

Nicole teaches free New Pregnancy classes every third Saturday of the month, and free Childbirth Education classes at the hospital and includes the ‘understanding and soothing your newborn’ information on the last day of the childbirth series. However anyone is invited to attend that particular class for $30. The next HUG class, which includes the Happiest Baby on the Block info and baby wearing advice and practice (slings / Bjorn) will be on Wednesday September 7th from 5:30-8:30pm. Contact Nicole if you plan to attend by emailing her at NFrens@epMedCenter.com."

See another view on Happiest Baby vs HUG Your Baby

The HUG, Carrots and Cucumbers!

2011-09-04T09:40:00.003-04:00

I am standing between the carrots and the cucumbers at Whole Foods today when a woman hurries up to me with her teenage daughter. "I have always wanted my daughter to meet you -- again!," the woman says. "For years I've told her how you did that 'baby exam' on her when she was a newborn. And, you were right. She has always been a self-soother," this mom explains. Mom glows and her daughter looks surprisingly interested to meet a character from a story she has heard about herself for years! This feels like an intimate and tender moment for a couple of gals in the produce section of the local grocery!

We must never take for granted how precious are the moments we spend with a family and their newborn. Giving a HUG during those early days makes a difference to new moms and dads. We are privileged to be there and honored to hold a space in their family story.

HUG Your Baby Goes to Iran

2011-08-12T09:31:00.024-04:00

Maryam Mozafarinia is a NICU nurse in Tehran and has just become the first Certified HUG Teacher in Iran. Maryam recently completed a Master's in Neonatal Intensive Care Nursing. With six years' experience as a NICU nurse, she bring great know-how and commitment to her parents. Maryam's special interest is to educate and support NICU fathers. She feels The HUG will give fathers basic knowledge about their baby's body language, help them ask questions, and encourage them to share their feelings and concerns. Today she shares a story about her patient, Mahdi, a little one-week-old.

Mahdi was born at 38 weeks and is hospitalized in the NICU because of TTN (Transient Tachypnea of Newborn). He has had two days of oxygen support and is NPO. Though his reflexes are good, he demonstrates strong, NNS (Non Nutritive Sucking) to calm down. After this short time of restricted feeding, he can now fully breastfeed. Mother’s milk is enough, and the baby has a good latch and sucking pattern.

But, mother seems worried and is not satisfied. During my shift I notice she repeatedly comes over to nurse her baby. Then the baby switches from the Active Sleep/Resting Zone to the Crying/Rebooting Zone.

“What is wrong today?” I ask her. The young mother explains, “It seems like he wants to keep eating, but he still looks hungry.”

I look at the baby. He is fussing and crying and continuously squirming in his mother’s arm. At one time he seems to search for her breast but then refuses to eat. This mother looks tired.

“Let’s see if we can help him calm down,” I say. Since the baby’s belly shows he is overfed, I help his mother hold him upright for burping. Now he is in the quiet, alert, Ready Zone -- a good time to enhance this mother-infant dyad.

I follow some of the techniques I learned in the HUG course. First, I swaddle him to minimize his movement. When he is calm, I shake the rattle to attract his attention. Mahdi’s eyes brighten and his movements freeze. As I continue shaking the toy, he moves his eyes and head to my direction.

Mahdi's mother is surprised by her baby's reaction. I shake the rattle again and he follows its movement. But, after a few moments he sends out an S.O.S (Sign of Over-Stimulation): “Switching Off.” While I am explaining S.O.S. to this mother, I notice that the baby is moving to the Resting Zone's Active/Light sleep.

Because he has entered the Resting Zone, I ask Mahdi's mother to put the baby in his incubator. Mahdi sleeps for three continuous hours and the mother seems more relaxed and calm too.

With HUG techniques and strategies many things are predictable (and possible)! Now, I’m convinced that I can have a better, more friendly and supportive relationship with young parents. Thank you, HUG!

See program for parents, "Breastfeeding Support and Newborn Care for Muslim Families."

© HUG Your Baby 2011

Focus on Human Milk Components - Important conference coming to North Carolina.

2011-07-30T22:06:00.007-04:00

I am delighted to have been in touch with Pamela K. Murphy, PhD, a Certified Nurse Midwife and Lactation Consultant, who is bringing pertinent and practical lactation education to North Carolina.

Dr. Murphy works at the Medical University of South Carolina in Charleston, where she provides lactation guidance for mothers who give birth to infants born as early as 24 weeks gestation. These mothers are encouraged to provide their infant with their own breastmilk because of the numerous protective benefits breastmilk offers. Dr. Murphy collaborates with a multidisciplinary team of health care providers to establish and maintain maternal milk supply while supporting the preterm infant’s growth needs.

With years of experience working with young families, Dr. Murphy knows what information and support a new mom needs in order to succeed as a breastfeeding mother. As an educator of professionals at the university and national level, she has learned that lactation consultants want both the medical knowledge and the clinical skills this conference will provide.

Focus on Human Milk Components features neonatologists, Carol Wagner, MD, and Sarah Taylor, MD. They will cover important issues such as: the composition of maternal breastmilk, Vitamin D and breastmilk, and providing maternal breastmilk while supporting the growth needs of the preterm infant. Pediatric Nurse Practitioner and Lactation Consultant, Barbara Haase, will discuss the benefits and technique of hind-milk intervention. Abbie Cluver, MD, a radiologist specializing in breast imaging, will discuss radiology topics in lactation. And, Dr. Murphy will discuss the hurdles mother's face with establishing and maintaining maternal milk supply while enduring the stress of having a preterm infant in the neonatal intensive care unit.

Join colleagues in Charlotte, NC, on September 12, 2011. Register at http://www.thelactationconference.com/charlotte/

Feedback about New HUG Training

2011-07-08T16:48:00.005-04:00

Teaching Newborn Behavior to Extend Breastfeeding Duration" has just been released! Approved for 1.5 (L) CERP credit and 1.5 Contact Hours credit, this program is now being taken by lactation consultants, doulas, nurses and childbirth educators around the country.

What do they think about this program?

"I've been an IBCLC since 1997 and was a LLL Leader for over 30 years so I thought I had heard it all. Not so! This program offered a new explanation of baby states and how to explain this to moms. Can't wait for the follow-up program!" Geraldine Perkins, home-visiting IBCLC Lactation Consultant from Chatham, New Jersey.

HUG Your Baby Presents at Regional Conference:"Leading the Race to Best Practice"

2011-07-08T09:01:00.002-04:00

Don't miss the upcoming North and South Carolin Perinal Partnership Conference in Concord, NC August 28-30.

Pre-conference presentations include:
“Real Talk About Real Teens”
“HUG Your Baby: Helping Parents Understand their Newborn”

General conference offerings include:
―Normal Birth Across Generations
“Communicating the Team STEPPS Way”
“Another Look at Vaginal Birth After Cesarean Section
“Update on CDC Guidelines for the Prevention of GBS”
“Breastfeeding Best Practices”
. . . and more!

"I think my baby is bored with me!" the Doula hears.

2011-07-07T09:17:00.019-04:00

"BEFORE and AFTER" HUG Teaching Photos!

Eliza is a special mom in a special situation. She had suffered from severe postpartum depression after the birth of her first child. Fortunately, her family and friends gave Eliza and her family the help they needed to make it through those difficult months. During this second pregnancy Eliza stayed under the watchful eye of a pyschiatrist and hired a birth doula to offer the additional encouragement and support this mom wants. Following a lovely natural birth, Eliza and her baby are doing great. Today the doula is making a follow-up home visit and is surprised to find Eliza is worried.

This young mother is remarkably attentive to her little one. But this morning she describes "the wierdest behavior in my baby." "I am worried that Willa is bored with me," she reports. She goes on to explain. "I'll be real excited talking to and loving on my little gal when suddenly she'll roll her eyes up and look away from me. Now, I've seen my 13-year-old niece do that to my sister, and I know what that means: 'Mom, you are boring me!'"

Like all moms, Eliza wants to feel connected to her baby. Research on postpartum depression shows that the interaction between a depressed mother and her baby is altered from birth. The ability of the mother to accurately "read" her baby's body language is hampered. Worry about being the perfect mom can similarly impact those early parenting days.

Eliza is understandably more sensitive than some moms would be to how her baby responds to her. She is aware of how much she missed out on those early connections with baby number one, and now she wants to gobble up every morsel of love and attention with this little one. But today, Eliza is misunderstanding important NORMAL newborn behavior.

As Eliza is decribing her concerns, I see little Willa do exactly what Mom is explaining. At first her arms jerk just a bit, her breathing increases slightly, and then she looks away from her mother's face. At once I recognize Willa's common behavior as an SOS (Sign of Over Stimulation). I remind Eliza of the HUG DVD we had watched during her pregnancy and how she had laughed when that cute baby had looked away from her mother's face.

Eliza birghtens up as she gently holds Willa's hands against her chest, softly calls her name and is rewarded when her baby slowly turns toward her mother's face.

Eliza's sigh of relief is a clear reminder of how important it is that new parents be given skills to read and respond to normal newborn behavior. And in a case such as Eliza's, this information can help heal wounds of the past and set up this special mom for satisfying and effective interactions with her baby for years to come.

© HUG Your Baby 2011

Ohio WIC and HUG Your Baby Collaboration

2011-06-30T14:25:00.003-04:00

Great news from Ohio! The Ohio Health Dept has purchased The HUG DVD for their WIC breastfeeding counselors - for the whole state!

Ohio has a special Breastfeeding Peer Helper Program. "The Breastfeeding Peer Helper Program is a program designed to enhance the breastfeeding support services provided by WIC. Breastfeeding peer helpers are women in the community with personal breastfeeding experience. They provide mother-to-mother breastfeeding education and support which in turns helps mothers successfully reach their breastfeeding goals. Peer Helpers assist by establishing a connection with families, helping mothers in managing common concerns, providing ongoing encouragement and offering comfort outside the usual workday. The development of the Breastfeeding Peer Helper program has increased breastfeeding initiation and duration rates among the WIC population."

Nearly 400 HUG DVDs were recently mailed out and will be entering the lives of expectant and new parents very soon!

Safe Dogs and Safe Babies

2011-06-16T08:57:00.008-04:00

I confess that I had not considered the importance of educating parents about the safety of dogs and babies until I encountered the work of Dogs and Storks. This organization does a wonderful job teaching parents to read a dog's body language and use this infomation to teach children to connect safely to their family pet. This work incorporates HUG Your Baby's parent education resources which teach professionals and the parents they serve how to read the body languge of a newborn. I highly recommend that professionals and parents explore the information and wisdom of this remarkable organization which has discovered how to "Give a HUG" to both the family dog and their baby!

Jan Tedder, RN, FNP, Lactation Consultant, President of HUG Your Baby

WIC Programs Under Threat

2011-06-14T21:36:00.004-04:00

Republican Congresswoman Virginia Foxx has proposed an amendment to destroy WIC’s peer counseling program!

I have had the privilege to teach The HUG Your Baby course to WIC peer counselors and appreciate what a goldmine they are! We need to be reminded that:

*A a minimum of $3.6 billion would be saved if current US exclusive breastfeeding rates increased to at least 50% at 6 months.
*Participation in WIC prenatal and peer counseling programs is associated with an increased rate of breastfeeding initiation.
*Women who attend WIC breastfeeding support groups are twice as likely to plan to breastfeed as those who do not.
*Formula feeding is best for mothers who are unable to breastfeed, not as a first choice for infant feeding.

Let the political leadership know that babies and their mothers need our support during this most vulnerable time.

Good News!
Mary Overfiedl, IBCLC, reports: "Thanks to all that sent emails and made calls...just in....By a recorded vote of 119 to 306, Rep. Virginia Foxx’s (R-NC) misguided amendment to zero out WIC’s Breastfeeding Peer Counseling and Performance Bonuses went down to a resounding defeat. A total of 118 Republicans joined 188 Democrats in opposing the amendment! Kudos to all who worked so hard to get the word out!"

The Power of "Start Here not There" a Certified HUG Teacher Learns!

2011-06-13T09:46:00.007-04:00

Newly Certified HUG Teacher, Nicole Frens, "Gives A HUG" as a childbirth educator and birth doula in Estes Park, Colorado. Nicole uses The HUG resources in her childbirth classes and on home visits with new moms and dads. Her passion and enthusiam for her work with young parents echoes in her communication with me throughout this Certification process, and especially through this story she shares:

Happy to have a captive audience, I had assured my birth doula client that I WOULD be sharing my new HUG information with her at her postpartum visit 4 days after giving birth. This second-time mom was happy to listen to any information I had for her. I had the opportunity to use The HUG Strategy, ‘Start Here not There’, when she mentioned her concerns about breastfeeding. I found I could blend my usual post-birth doula discussion naturally with the HUG material. I wasn’t sure how much she already knew, having already had a newborn in the house just 2 years before, but I felt good sharing what I know about newborn behavior. She was hugely thankful for the HUG brochure I gave her, noting that she could use the reminder information.

During our meeting she was confident, happy, and loving her easygoing baby. Though I felt like she probably knew much of what I shared, she listened attentively to all I said.

It surprised me to get another call from her in less than a week. Breastfeeding wasn’t going so great all of a sudden, and she needed help. As soon as I entered her house I learned that not only was she having painful breastfeeding sessions, but her formerly easygoing baby was showing another side of himself, and had just ended a long screaming session. At our last visit she had appeared to be politely listening to me. Now she was searching for help on many things.

We addressed her now cracked and bleeding nipples, and I interspersed reminders of the information I had given her before. "Remember, he isn’t so good at multi-tasking, so maybe swaddling him will help," I remarked. "He’ll be better at latching on if he’s not already crying," I reminded her. "And, look for those feeding cues and then try to bring him to the Ready Zone," I commented. "Notice when his movements become jerky, and get ready to act if necessary," I suggested.

This young mother was taking in all I said and seemed eager to watch for the newborn behaviors I was describing. Feeling a tad out of control and having pain with breastfeeding had motivated this mom to seek more help and advice. Sharing information with her seemed easier now that we had specific concerns to address.

It’s not that I think a HUG visit should always happen after the parents have cried ‘uncle’, but maybe they’re more receptive if so…

WIC Peer Counselors give feedback about HUG Training!

2011-06-10T00:40:00.006-04:00

This month a classroom of NC Breastfeeding Peer Counselors completed the HUG Your Baby training. I was so impressed by the passion and dedication of these women who spend their days supporting breastfeeding mothers in their communities. Sharing success stories and challenging moments these WIC women and l learned from one anothers' experiences. Hear now what these professionals had to say about "Getting The HUG!"

100% "Strongly Agree or Agree" with "Today’s topics and activities were relevant to my work."

100% "Strongly Agree or Agree" with "The speakers used more than one method to present their topics (visual, verbal, written handout etc)."

100% "Strongly Agree or Agree" with "The speaker explained the topics clearly and understandably."

Do you have WIC counselors in your community who might benefit from HUG Training? If so, contact HUG Your Baby and bring The HUG to your neighborhood!

Winner of First "HUG Your LC" Scholarship

2011-06-07T06:01:00.008-04:00

HUG Your Baby wants to thank and support professionals who devote exceptional passion and energy to moms and babies in their communities. This year we are pleased to offer a training scholarship to a local lactation educator who is engaged in the exciting, challenging (and expensive) lactation consultant training process.

Angie Hilliard has worked with breastfeeding mothers for decades. As a student of the late Mary Tulley (a regional and national lactation leader) and a home visiting peer counselor in central North Carolina, Angie has years of "hands-on" experiece, good sense, and knowledge of when to tweak a situation and when to refer to backup lactation consultants. Over the years I have heard about her dedication, thorough evaluations, and tireless encouragement of new mothers. She has been only a phone call away from me when I have been stumped by a challenging breastfeeding problem at UNC Family Medicine.

Angie deserves both thanks and support as she moves forward in her study to become a lactation consultant. HUG Your Baby is delighted to award her our first "HUG Your LC" scholarship. This scholarship gives Angie access to the Health e-Learning IBCLC Lactation Exam Practice as she prepares to take this international exam, given once a year in July.

Best wishes, Angie. We're proud of you!!

Hadiyah worries, "My baby doesn't like my milk!"

2011-06-04T14:47:00.005-04:00

“Ayesha doesn't like my milk!" the young mother declares. "It must not be strong enough for her. I guess it's time for formula."

Her words are a surprise to the nurse at the nearby clinic. Four-week-old Ayesha had regained her birth weight in just ten days and was now growing at a great, one ounce-per-day clip. I see her cheeks beginning to fill out, and she is "filling" her diapers with gusto. Why is this mother thinking that her breastfeeding is going poorly?

"She just doesn't seem satisfied," Ayesha's mother explains. After a deep sigh, this young mother adds, “and she seems to be fussier this week.”

At the baby’s two-week-old weight check the nurse had shared with these parents evidence that breastfeeding was going well. Mom had a great latch and she could hear the baby swallowing milk. Dad kept a careful record of wet and stooled diapers. But Ayesha seems to be noticing non-feeding behaviors and worrying that these are signs of inadequate milk.
  
Reaserch on breastfeeding demonstrate that this mother's feelings are common. This research shows that a mother will watch carefully to see if her baby becomes alert and will gaze deeply into her eyes. She will notice if she is able to calm her baby effectively, and she feels bad if her baby is irritable or difficult to console.

The nurse is quick to understand this mother's needs so she comments enthusiastically, “She looks happy with you, Ayesha. When you talk to your baby her forehead relaxes, her eyes widen, and her eyebrows go up.” A moment later she goes on, “When you speak, she lifts her face toward yours and moves her arms in smooth circles over her head—almost like she’s dancing with you.”

Then the nurse invites the mother to watch Ayesha play some baby “games.” Hadiyah smiles and hands the nurse the baby. The nurse sways her gently to bring her to the more fully alert, “Ready Zone.” The baby’s eyes brighten and she looks intently at the nurse's red rattle, held just ten inches from her face. As the nurse slowly shakes the rattle, Ayesha’s eyes follow the toy intently from one side to the other. Hadiyah giggles and remarks, "She's really smart, I guess!"

Holding Ayesha near her mother’s face, the nurse encourage the young mother to call her baby's name. Ayesha initially gets still when she hears her mother’s voice, and then her eyes seem to shift toward her mother. Hadiyah is delighted to see her daughter actually turn her head slowly in her mom's direction and then notices how their eyes “lock” in an endearing gaze. With a big grin Hadiyah lifts Ayesha from the nurse's hands and snuggles her face into the crease of the baby's soft neck. One of the mother's hands go to her breast to suppress the unexpected let down of milk.   

Having learned more about Ayesha's remarkable abilities, Hadiyah seems to relax. Now it is easier for her to hear the reassuring comments from the nurse as they discuss normal fussiness (starting around two weeks of age) and how to calm a baby.

Three months later, Ayesha's mom is a breastfeeding star and an advocate for other new moms. One afternoon Hadiyah comes to the nurse's breastfeeding class to discuss the challenges and joys of breastfeeding. Cuddling with her baby, she remarks "Don't just count those pees and poops. Learn about the amazing abilities of your newborn and you'll know for sure that your breastmilk is perfect!"

© HUG Your Baby 2011

"Parent As Teacher" Professional trains as a Certified HUG Teacher

2011-05-25T22:12:00.002-04:00

Nancy Spencer, M.Ed., is a parent consultant and a leader in the world of Parents As Teachers. For decades she has provided support to teachers and parents through workshops and in-home consultations about a child’s development, behavior, and the challenges of parenting. As part of her Certified HUG Teacher process Nancy taught a HUG Your Baby class to a group of expecting teen girls. Today, she shares this amazing story with us.

We were a small, cozy group of young high school girls and two parent educators, drinking hot chocolate and talking about dreams for their babies, babies who are already here and those who have not yet arrived. We talked about getting to know our babies and reading their cues. As we looked at the HUG video clips, talked about the many ways our babies can be our teachers, and shared their experiences, these young moms were amazed at how adept their babies would be at communicating.

The young mom of a 10-month-old little girl was able to recall periods, when her daughter was an infant, that she would demonstrate SOSs (Signs of Over-Stimulation), and recalled what she attempted to do for her baby. She then related how she continues to recognize when her daughter is over-stimulated and needs help calming down. This young mom knows her daughter well and is learning to support her as she continues to grow and learn about self-regulation.

Another young mom who is eagerly awaiting the arrival of her baby boy was amazed at what she saw in the videos. Her response was, “Wow! I didn’t know babies could calm like that! I will remember these things to help my baby when he gets here!”

As a parent educator, I am often overwhelmed by the road ahead for these young mothers and by the tremencous task that faces them. At the same time, I am encouraged by the support and guidance The HUG is able to provide our youngest parents. I look forward to using The HUG Your Baby materials to educates and encourage new parents--of all ages--as they begin the amazing journey of parenting.

© HUG Your Baby 2011

New Certified HUG Teacher Uses The HUG to Enhance Services to Young Families!

2011-05-25T22:07:00.002-04:00

Gail is a professional certified birth and postpartum doula, and certified childbirth educator that has been attending births in the triangle area since 2006. When Gail attends a birth, she brings not only her heart and passion for birth, but experience and training from almost 70 births and continual research on subjects relating to birth. As an educator and doula, she keeps up –to-date on the latest studies, procedures, protocols and policies surrounding birth and area hospitals and providers. Incorporating the Hug Your Baby curriculum with her clients has been very well received and the parents are so encouraged by what they learn about normal behaviors of the newborn-sleep patterns, tips for calming crying baby, and how to identify overstimulation. Contact Gail at 910-980-8111.

What a joy it was to visit with four babies on one Saturday and to go over the HUG YOUR BABY video with them. The babies' ages ranged from almost 1 week to almost 8 weeks of age. Instead of using a ball, I used a large plastic container of Tic Tacs. (You can get them in different colors and they make a great noise for baby to hear.) It has been wonderful to work with parents and to show them the benefits of the Hug Your Baby program. ALL of the families are eager to learn about how to make their baby less fussy and how to get them to sleep. As a childbirth educator, it will be so exciting to add the Hug Your Baby approach to my curriculum. Gail Dixon, CD(DONA), PCD(DONA), CCBE, LE

How Were Your Supported to Breastfeed?

2011-05-20T08:55:00.003-04:00

Here is an important "Call for Stories" from the United States Breastfeeding Committee.

How Were YOU Supported to Breastfeed?

Help us to spread the word that all moms need and deserve good support to make breastfeeding possible!
Tell us your story about how you and your baby were supported to breastfeed, or what particular kind of support made all the difference for you.

For each story you submit you’ll automatically be entered for a chance to win a Graco® Secure Coverage™ Digital Monitor (drawing to be held 5/23) or Graco® Pack 'n Play® Playard (drawing to be held 5/30) from Newell Rubbermaid.

We are seeking stories in these ten categories (Go to this link to open each category and to share a story):

Support from your baby's father, grandmothers, or other family members
Support from friends, peer counselors or mother-to-mother support groups
Support from community organizations (local nonprofits, churches, breastfeeding centers)
Support from your hospital or birth center
Support from your health care providers (obstetrician, midwife, pediatrician)
Support from a lactation consultant
Support from milk banks or donor human milk
Support from access to maternity leave
Support from your employer
Support from your child care provider

HUG Your Baby's New Collaboration with International Childbirth Organization!

2011-03-30T06:14:00.022-04:00

Several weeks ago leadership from CAPPA (the world's largest childbirth education organization) and HUG Your Baby gathered to finalize and celebrate a collaboration of two tremendous resources for young families.

Watch CAPPA's announcement as Tracy Wilson Peters explains how all newly certified CAPPA professionals will now "Get The HUG" along with their CAPPA certification!

This moment in time began three years ago at the CAPPA 2008 Dallas conference. That's when Laurel Wilson (far right) first heard The HUG presentation and encouraged Jan to expand her vision of how HUG Your Baby could reach out to the childbirth and parenting community.

Two years later Kay Miller (far left) became one of the the first Certified HUG Teachers and took on the mission of incorporating HUG teaching into the CAPPA curriculum.

After months of investigation and careful consideration, CAPPA leadership--led by Tracy Wilson Peters, CAPPA CEO (second from left)--concluded that CAPPA and HUG Your Baby share a synergetic vision to educate, encourage, and empower young families. A collaboration seemed imperative.

And, Jan (second from right), counts her blessings that this great collaboration was conceived, and now is born (full-term and healthy!).

© HUG Your Baby 2011

Subtle Signals that Speak Volumes: Observe Your Baby and Dog!

2011-03-26T19:28:00.003-04:00

Guest Author: Jennifer Shryock B.A. CDBC who teaches parents how to introduce their new baby to the dog in the family. See her blog and her website.

I remember the first time I saw Jan present the HUG program. I immediately thought that what she was educating about babies was so similar to what I educate families about dogs. It was all about observation, connecting and learning how to respond most effectively.

Just like babies, dogs offer signals and behaviors that give us a glimpse of how they are handling stimulating situations or stressful encounters. Learning about subtle dog communications is very much similar to learning to observe S.O.S.

Families with dogs and children can help increase safety by becoming familiar with some of the subtle ways dogs let us know they are stressed or experiencing conflict. Here are a few examples of such signals that I did not recognize many years ago when my teens were babies.

Licking lips or tongue flicking often happens as a distance increasing behavior or when crowded. The difference between this and “licking chops” is that the dog has not been eating nor is there food around. Usually this signal is offered with a head turn away from the stressful situation.
This signal is fast and many never see this first indicator of discomfort or stress. Observe how your dog uses this signal. Notice when and what is happening when you observe this. That will help you learn how your dog communicates and you will be able to better respond.

Jan talks about “spacing out” and “switching off” I discuss how dogs sniff and scratch in the same way. Dogs will suddenly be sniffing or scratching for no reason other than to “shut out” or “switch off” from the stimulation that is causing discomfort or conflict. This is very commonly seen around toddlers and often a signal parents do not observe. Just as parents can observe changes in babies color, movement and breathing patterns they can learn to observe the subtle changes in their dog’s ears, eyes, tails and muzzles. This type of observation is the key to prevention and success in homes with kids and dogs. Sadly many families wait until they have experienced a growl or worse yet a bite. Dogs offer many signals prior to escalating or resorting to a growl or bite.

These are just a few examples of the many subtle signals dogs offer when stressed. Like babies, dogs bodies tell us what is happening and how they are coping with different situations. This allows us an opportunity to decrease stimulation and offer support so that our dogs can be successfully included in their growing families.
I encourage all expectant and new families to take some time and learn about dog body language and communication so that they can understand and safely include their companions as their families grow. HUG Your Baby 2011

The BONET: Helping a New Mom Understand Her Baby's Behavior

2011-02-24T20:10:00.017-05:00

Donna Karl, MS, APRN, BC, is a nurse, educator and researcher at Children's Hospital Boston. She and her pediatrician colleague, Dr. Connie Keefer, have just published "Use of the Behavioral Observation of the Newborn Educational Trainer for Teaching Newborn Behavior." This article describes The BONET (Behavioral Observation of the Newborn Educational Trainer),"a learning aid that educates clinicians aboewborn behavioral organization, self-regulation skills, and interactive capabilities."(1)

Donna and I have been reading each other's work for a number of years and have recently corresponded about The BONET and The HUG. I appreciate the following story she shares with me today!

"As you, I love the work of facilitating parents' interest in their newborns and their understanding of how to interpret and respond to them. I know that there is evidence that early maternal-child programs are associated with improved outcomes in parenting, reduced abuse and neglect rates, and better school performance in children. If I didn't believe that what I do, even in the first few days of a baby's life, helps the family over the long haul, I'd not bother with behavioral interventions.

An example of the value of this intervention happened just today. I had a primip mom whose baby was extremely fussy. Mom began by telling me that when other people were around he was quiet, but he cried when he was with her. She recently had a large, excited family visiting the hospital, passing the baby around and talking loudly as he "slept." After they left and she was alone with her son, he cried inconsolably. She interpreted this behavior as meaning that he was relaxed and peaceful when the family was around, but upset and unable to be comforted with her. The truth was that he was closing down to protect himself from the visitors' commotion. Left exhausted by this commotion, he cried inconsolably from overstimulation when he was alone with her.

I showed her how to distinguish between close down (eyebrows knitted with eyes closed and fists clenched) and sleep. When we first started talking, her baby was closed down, but as she held him he relaxed and his face and hands lost their tension. We also talked about calming methods--an infant carrier, white noise, swaddling, sucking, vestibular stimulation. We wrapped him snuggly together and I showed her the "head and hiny hold," a vestibular calming maneuver. She practiced this maneuver, first being afraid to move him, then gaining more confidence, and finally succeeding in quieting him.

We also talked about temperament and how some babies need more help protecting themselves from stimulation and calming down.

By the end of the day, Mom was saying that she had had some quiet moments with him noticing that his face had been relaxed and not tense. She said that she was going to protect him from too much exposure to the extended family and had even engaged her mother to help her do that. Both were on board. Finally, she added that her mom had just told her that she herself had some of the same behaviors as a newborn. This revelation seemed to further relieve mom.

There was nothing profound about this intervention--not rocket science, as they say. You and I both do it every day. But by the afternoon, this mom was visibly less anxious and talking about her small successes in consoling the baby during the day. How can a change like this, regardless of how ordinary, not make some difference in the first few days? Of course, there are no guarantees. But hopefully, this mom will be able to build on her early "successes" in reading the baby's cues and responding to them and, eventually, go down a path of responsive parenting. She has also agreed to a referral to a home-based support program."

(1) JOGNN (2011) 40: 75-83.

Lamaze International Approves Two Online HUG Courses for LCCE Educator Credit

2011-02-21T23:11:00.000-05:00

As leaders in the field of childbirth education, Lamaze International has just approved two HUG online courses.

Helping Parents Understand their Newborn (Part I approved for two contact hours credit):
1. describes primary concepts of The HUG to prevent and solve problems around a baby's eating, sleeping, crying, and around parent-child attachment and bonding
2. presents real-life scenarios using The HUG with new moms and dads
3. provides tools and resources to introduce The HUG concepts to families

See course details and watch preview of course.

HUG Strategies and Skill Building (Part II approved for four contact hours credit):
1. shows how the HUG Strategies enhance parent's confidence and care of their baby
2. demonstrates how use of the HUG Strategies enhances the patient-provider relationship
3. provides more in-depth review of medical and child development literature on infant zones, crying, eating, sleeping, and play
4. enhances providers' ability to demonstrate baby's abilities to see, hear and respond to her parents
5. reviews impact of The HUG on fathering and on secure attachment
6. presents case studies, video analysis, HUG Your Baby blogs, and problem-solving experiences

See course details and watch preview of course

I am reminded of the blog, "I didn't know a baby was a REAL person!" which speaks to the power of introducing The HUG concepts and techniques during a childbirth education class.

As one Lamaze instructor recently told me, "Childbirth might last a day or two, but parenting. . . that last a lifetime! It's wonderful to help parents-to-be prepare both for that 'BIG DAY' and the 'MANY DAYS' that follow!"

First Research on HUG Your Baby Begins Soon!

2011-02-18T16:31:00.014-05:00

New Certified HUG Teacher, Julee Waldrop, has a DNP from Duke University, is a Family and Pediatric Nurse Practitioner and is an Associate Professor of Nursing at the University of Central Florida in Orlando. She has been working with parents and children for 25 years and teaching nurses and nurse practitioners for over 15 years. Today she shares with us her research expertise and upcoming plans to study the impact of using The HUG Your Baby tools and techniques with young families!

Most of us will keep on doing something if it is working, right? For example, Jan Tedder, creator of HUG Your Baby, has been doing this great work with parents for many years. She knows that it helps parents connect better with their babies and helps babies to grow and develop. She knows this because she has experienced it personally. Many of you feel the same way about The HUG. I know I do.

However, it is also important to demonstrate in a systematic and replicable way, as with research, that programs developed and disseminated to help parents become better at parenting really make a measurable difference. This is why at the College of Nursing at the University of Central Florida my research team and I are getting ready to test the hypothesis that high-risk parents who participate in The HUG parental education program will increase their parental self-efficacy compared to parents who do not participate in the program.

Well that sounds nice, but you might ask who are “high-risk” parents? High-risk parents are defined in this study as those who are single, who are 19 years old and under, whose insurance is Medicaid, and who are from an ethnic minority. Research has shown that such parents often have a tougher time adapting to parenthood.

And what is “parental self-efficacy”? That is a term used to describe the strength of a parent’s belief in their ability to accomplish the tasks of parenting. For example, knowing when a baby is hungry, being able to calm a fussy baby, or identifying when a baby is ready to play.

We are also going to compare symptoms of depression and stress in moms who participate in The HUG program and those who do not, as well as exclusivity and duration of breastfeeding and sleep patterns between the two groups. There may be more benefits to participating in The HUG program than just improving confidence in parenting. That is what this research project will be all about. Stay tuned for periodic updates as the data are collected and analyzed. In the meantime, keep sharing The HUG!

Michelle Obama to Promote Breastfeeding

2011-02-15T14:42:00.004-05:00

Finally, those of influence and power are reading the literature. "Why discuss childhood obesity without discussing breastfeeding," we have all wondered for a number of years. Now, Michelle Obama is on board. (See article in Politics Daily.) How wonderful to have someone of such importance, intelligence, and passion championing this life changing cause. YEAH!

Super Bowl Ad Depicts Traumatized Baby

2011-02-12T17:12:00.016-05:00

(The picture of the doll baby at left is from HomeAway's Super Bowl Ad.)

Though we are all accustomed to entertaining, and sometimes even slightly off-color Super Bowl ads, this year one of the advertisers crossed the line with its ad. (See You Tube Clip.)

HomeAway, Inc., a company that sells holiday rentals, thought that seeing a (doll) baby thrown full-face against a plate glass window would encourage people to abandon the stress and confines of a hotel room and choose instead the more spacious vacation rentals that this company claimed it offered.

Dr. Connie Keefer, a friend and pediatrician colleague from Children's Hospital Boston, wrote to let me know that the American Academy of Pediatrics sent out a news release this week stating clearly that they did not find this depiction of the care of a child at all entertaining.

Here is that release from the AAP:

Feb. 8, 2011
Brian Sharples, CEO
HomeAway Inc.
c/o Eileen Buesing Director of Global Public Relations

Dear Mr. Sharples:
The American Academy of Pediatrics wants to echo the concerns of parents who were dismayed by the depiction of a “test baby” being hurled against a plate glass window in the HomeAway Inc. Super Bowl ad on Sunday. Children have been horribly disabled or killed by such mistreatment. That is not comedy. We fail to see how it could possibly be considered an appropriate subject for a humorous video to sell vacation rentals.

The Academy commends you for listening to such concerns and quickly removing the offensive portions of the ad from your Web site.

Sincerely,
O. Marion Burton, MD, FAAP
President (AAP)

The Super Bowl "Shut Down"

2011-02-07T20:32:00.004-05:00

Hail Marys, open-field blocks, scrambling...these are all terms we've been hearing this week during the Super Bowl frenzy. But, today I hear about another important activity seen (though maybe not acknowledged) around the TV sets of America: "The Super Bowl Shut Down."

That's how a sensitive, attentive mom describes her baby's activities on Sunday.

Ahmad is a full-term, healthy baby boy. He is blessed with the love and attention of his mother and a caring community of friends and family. And, Sunday he attends his first Super Bowl game. Instead of wings, beer and brauts he feasts on mother's milk.

Though this two-week-old has periods of alertness when he looks intently at his mother's face, follows his auntie's voice, and relaxes into his neighbor's gentle hands, this little one seems at first "bored" with the world of football. After short nursing spurts, he slumbers into a "gone from the world" sleep and is finally placed in his Pack 'n' Play beside the TV.

"But, I've watched your HUG DVD," Mom reports, "so I didn't worry a bit! I could tell that all the excitement and commotion of our neighbor's family room was just causing him to 'Shut Down.'"

Mom goes on to explain that the baby rested well during the entire game then woke up for another feed and alert time with Mom when they got home. She reflects on how satisfying it was to see her baby "manage" the exuberant stimulation around him by "Shutting Down." She recognizes this ability as a sign of his physical skills, his budding competence. "If I hadn't seen the DVD I might have worried that something's wrong. Maybe he can't hear? Maybe he is fragile? Or, (worst yet) maybe he doesn't like football!"

Mom and I decide that Ahmad has just invented one of the newest, and coolest, football moves: "The Super Bowl Shut Down". He's a superstar already!

NEW Certified HUG Teacher Discovers "Starting Here, not There" Makes ALL the Difference

2011-02-01T21:05:00.013-05:00

(Picture: First-time Mom with her 10-month-old)

Michelle Delp, RN, ICCE, is a Nurse Home Visitor with the Nurse-Family Partnership of Wyoming/Bradford/Sullivan counties in Pennsylvania. She has had the opportunity to work in this remarkbale program that enables nurses to make home visits for several years to offer both support and education to young familes in need. Though her training has been exceptional and evidenced-based, Michelle discovers that The HUG Strategies enhance this training and the care she provides. What a story Michelle has to tell!!

The best thing I've learned from Hug Your Baby is how to make better connections with moms during a home visit. As a Nurse Home Visitor, I see a mother from early in her pregnancy until her child turns two years old, so there is a unique relationship that forms between that mother and her nurse. In preparing for a visit, I have a certain amount of curriculum I am hoping to cover when I arrive, as well as completing any assessments or paperwork that correspond with that visit. So, many times in the past, I have been easily derailed when I walk in the door and find Mom in the midst of a crisis, or sleep-deprived and grumpy, or just plain distracted. This has changed since I've learned to use the "Start Here, Not There" and "See Then Share" strategies.

On my last visit to the home of a 26-year-old, first-time mom and her ten-month-old baby, I went in prepared to do a developmental assessment on the child, and to offer a lesson on safety in the home to Mom. On arrival, I was greeted by a manic dog who wouldn't get out from under my feet, the baby strapped into a high chair and placed in front of the TV, and Mom in a high state of agitation over custody issues. My first inclination was to say, "Wow, this looks like a bad time for me to be here. Maybe I should come back another time."

Instead, I grabbed hold of "Start Here, Not There," put down my baby scale and bag of paperwork, and encouraged Mom to express some of her feelings about the day's events. In the process, she removed the baby from in front of the TV and put him in her lap where he did a lovely job of grinning and showing me how he could "Pat-a-Cake."

Encouraged by this initial success I tried some "See Then Share": "Wow, you've been playing with and talking to your son this week, haven't you? Look how well he's learned to imitate you." This brought a big smile from Mom, and some encouragement from her to do it again, ultimately helping her to relax. It also led into that developmental assessment I needed to accomplish. "Hey, he's doing one of the things I'm looking for on that assessment we talked about. Let's see what other wonderful things he's learned over the last couple of weeks."

I've used these two strategies many times since. On occasion, I will move into "Gaze Then Engage," but a lot of the time I end up making a referral to mental health counseling to deal with some of the big issues that these moms face.

Many thanks, Hug Your Baby, for a great way to connect with my clients.
Michelle Delp, RN, ICCE

"Helping Parents Fall in Love with their Baby"

2011-01-23T13:44:00.006-05:00

Margaret Bain, an IBCLC lactation consultant in a hospital in northern Virginia, talks about her experience with parents and how The HUG connects to her work with new moms and dads.

I am a hospital-based Lactation Consultant, and I see my role not so much as promoting breastfeeding, but facilitating the process of parents falling in love with their new baby. I spend much of time teaching parents how to read their baby's signals as in:

Me: How did your baby's body feel to you before he was fed?
Mom: He was restless & tense.
Me: And how does his body feel to you now that he has finished feeding?
Mom: Relaxed.
Me: Why do you think that is?
Mom: Because he is no longer hungry.
Me: What does that tell you about your milk supply?
Mom: I must have milk.
Me: (thinks) Bingo!

Margaret is now studying The HUG online courses. Join her in this engaging and economical way to increase your skills to educate and support new parents!

Happiest Baby on the Block vs HUG Your Baby

2011-01-07T17:35:00.017-05:00

HUG Your Baby is different from Dr. Karp's work in three important ways.

Similar to Dr. Karp, HUG Your Baby deals directly with issues around crying.

"My Baby's Not Satisfied!"

2010-12-24T11:00:00.015-05:00

The young mother is frantic because she thinks her baby never seems quite satisfied. This mother has been committed to breastfeeding, but things just haven’t gone as she’d expected. Ten-day-old, Becky, has regained her birthweight and has lots of those mustard-seed poops and wet diapers. But, Mom still worries that her baby doesn't seem content.

About two hours after breastfeeding, the baby starts to wiggle and squirm. Though Mom remembers that this behavior can be an early feeding cue, she worries about how Becky's hands tremble, and her legs jerk, when she moves. The baby makes one odd face after another, and then she grunts and squeaks. The most worrisome of all the newborn’s behaviors is how Becky responds when her mother talks to her. The baby sometimes glances off to the side and even closes her eyes when Mom repeatedly calls her name. The mother figures that all this must mean Becky is unhappy, and not satisfied with her breast milk.

Sitting in her pantry are a few of those "gift" formula packages from the hospital. The lady next door had told this young mother that “bottle feeding worked great for me—and it’s so much easier!” Yesterday, after a particularly “squirmy day,” Mom prepared just a couple of bottles to “top off her breastfeeding.” Today, little Becky seems to be spitting up more often and having more gas bubbles. Confused and upset, the mother finally goes off to meet with the nurse at the health department.

Fortunately, the nurse has just completed the HUG course on helping parents understand their baby's body language. It is common, the nurse learns, for moms to be confused by, and to misinterpret, a baby’s normal body language.

Healthy newborns often exhibit some tremors and jerking of arms or legs, especially when over-stimulated. Some babies can be overwhelmed by a mom’s attention and demonstrate a “Spacing Out” SOS by looking away from their mothers. As new babies develop their sleep-wake cycles, many will wiggle and squirm in active sleep, for a moment, before returning back to deep sleep.

When such behaviors are misunderstood, a young mother can feel unsuccessful—and might “give a little formula” in response. Because one bottle can easily lead to more formula, a well-meaning mother’s confidence to breastfeed can be undermined if she does not receive wiser advice.

The nurse is ready to help this young mother “read her baby’s body language.” When Becky is lifted from the car seat, the nurse comments on the slight tremor of the baby’s hands, and reflects how this behavior occurs with stimulation such as being picked up and moved. [See video clips of reading a baby's SOS (Sign of Over-stimulation)]

As the nurse prepares to help Mom bring Becky to the breast, the baby gets a bit red in the face and looks away from her mother’s soft voice. Again, the nurse uses Becky’s behavior to help this mother recognize a normal “Spacing Out” SOS. After placing the baby skin-to-skin, the mother is surprised to see Becky relax, her color return to normal, and her gaze rest momentarily on her mother’s face.

When Becky later starts to cry, the nurse helps Mom gently hold her baby’s hands against her chest. The baby is comforted and then latches on easily.

The young mother is so grateful that she came to see the health department nurse today. She and the nurse discuss how to maintain Mom’s milk supply and to monitor Becky’s weight, pees and poops. Mom leaves the clinic with a bounce in her step. “Now I can tell what my baby is saying to me: “Mom, you are the best—and so is your milk!’”

© HUG Your Baby 2011

Breastfeeding Support for Muslim Women

2010-12-11T19:08:00.002-05:00

Reading your baby's body language is the first step to being a successful breastfeeding mother. Preview the HUG Your Baby DVD and sign up for the FREE E-Newsletter for Parents in order to learn tips for preventing and solving problems around a baby's eating, sleeping, crying, and attachment.

WIC Breastfeeding Peer Counselors praise HUG Your Baby training!

2010-12-10T07:49:00.005-05:00

Thirty Breastfeeding Peer Counselors attended a HUG Your Baby Workshop in Raleigh, NC on 12/2/2010

At the end of the workshop, participants were asked to rate their ability to do the following before and then after they took the class. This approach to evaluation was intended to assess participants’ view of what learning occurred. Participants completed this questionnaire; results are summarized here.

131% Improvement in I can see a baby’s “Zones” and explain them to a parent.
62% Improvement in I know how to explain a baby’s Signs of Over-Stimulation (SOSs) to a parent.
64% Improvement in I know what it means when an over- stimulated baby looks away from his mother .
69% Improvement in I can tell the difference between a baby’s “active sleep” and “deep sleep.”
66% Improvement in I know how to explain how some babies “Shut Down” while trying to breastfeed.
38% Improvememt in I know how to teach a parent to calm a fussy baby.
40% Improvement in I know how to show a parent the amazing things a baby can do.

100% said, "Yes!" The HUG Strategies will help me do a better job.

100% said, "Yes!" This class was fun to take.

100% said, "Yes!"I would recommend this class to other peer counselors.

Consider HUG Your Baby online training for lactation educators and consultants.
Contact Jan Tedder at hugyourbaby@earthlink.net with any questions.

The Magic of Helping New Moms and Dads

2010-11-13T11:36:00.009-05:00

It has been a year, now, that professionals from around the country have started to become Certified HUG Teachers. Though their background, training, and work with young families varies, their hopes for using The HUG sound similar. HUG Teachers want to help parents read their baby's body language in order to enhance the parent-child relationship and to give parents the confidence and skills to become the good moms and dads they want to be!

The hopes of these first HUG Teadchers, I believe, have been satisfied. The following stories show how.

"I recently attended a wonderful home birth in a small community south of the Triangle."

"Now I point out that her long hair was brushing his face and that his response was simply an"SOS"an infant’s Sign of Over Stimulation. This is not only a normal infant response but one that indicates he is a bright boy and knows how to reduce over-stimulation to calm himself. "

"During class, as we cover information on Active/Light Sleep and Still/Deep Sleep, I notice Carrie taking notes and nodding her head as if the information was just clicking. "

"When she was pregnant, she was excited and busy preparing for the arrival of her “new bundle of joy.” But then, once the baby arrived, reality set in….new responsibilities, lack of sleep, and having to manage the demands of day to day living, leaves mom feeling a bit overwhelmed."

"Corrie is a dedicated career woman who finally becomes a mom. After losing a baby at birth two years ago, she is especially eager to do whatever she needs to for her new baby, Marla."

"These parents were already beginning to recognize the differences between deep/quiet sleep and light/active sleep, as well as demonstrating how to appropriately respond to their infants' S.O.Ss! "
"She thanked me again for sharing information and techniques that helped her, and her baby, get a good night’s sleep!"

"Big Brother started to call out that his little brother did not like him. “Look how he keeps looking away from me. Every time I call his name he turns the other way!” the brother exclaims. "
"As we continue to talk, I see Jim and Julie’s confidence as parents return. The suggestions about swaddling, and bringing Avery’s arms to her chest when she fusses, make sense to them. “We’ll definitely add those to our ‘bag of tricks’!” Julie says. "

"I held Sean and asked Lana to softly say his name. He opened his eyes wide, turned to his mom, and looked at her face. What fun for the rest of us to see the huge smile on Lana’s face and to sense her love for her son!"

"But at seven months her daughter needs to have mom's nipple in her mouth during EVERY nap and ALL NIGHT LONG! "

"Traci explained, “I just nursed her and laid her down 30 minutes ago. Look at her squirm and wiggle! Sometimes her eyes flash open, and she even makes some sounds.”"

"I Think My Baby Is Bored With Me!"

2010-11-11T03:42:00.021-05:00

"BEFORE and AFTER" HUG Teaching Photos!

Eliza comes in with Willa, her second child. Eliza is a special mom in a special situation. She had suffered from severe postpartum depression after the birth of her first child. Fortunately, her family and friends gave Eliza and her family the help and support they needed to make it through those difficult months. During this second pregnancy Eliza stayed under the watchful eye of an encouraging pyschiatrist and now seems to be doing great. Eliza is here with her robust, healthy two-week-old for her well child visit.

But Eliza is worried. She is remarkably attentive to her little one and describes the oddest behavior. "I am worried that Willa is bored with me," she reports. She goes on to explain. "I'll be real excited talking to and loving on my little gal when suddenly she'll roll her eyes up and look away from me. Now, I've seen my 13-year-old niece do that to my sister, and I know what that means: 'Mom, you are boring me!'"

Eliza is understandably more sensitive than some moms would be to how her baby responds to her. She is aware of how much she missed out on those early connections with baby number one, and now she wants to gobble up every morsel of love and attention with this little one. But today, Eliza is misunderstanding important NORMAL newborn behavior.

As Eliza is decribing her concerns, I see little Willa do exactly what Mom is explaining. At first her arms jerk just a bit, her breathing increases slightly, and then she looks away from her mother's face. At once I recognize Willa's common behavior as an SOS (Sign of Over Stimulation). I remind Eliza of the HUG DVD we had watched during her pregnancy and how she had laughed when that cute baby had looked away from her mother's face. Eliza birghtens up as she gently holds Willa's hands against her chest, softly calls her name and is rewarded by her slow turn toward her mother's face. Eliza's sigh of relief is a clear reminder of how important it is that new parents be given skills to read and respond to normal newborn behavior. And in a case such as Eliza's, this information can help heal wounds of the past and set up this special mom for satisfying and effective interactions with her baby for years to come.

New Certified HUG Teacher Shares The HUG with Parents and Wildlife!

2010-11-07T16:45:00.008-05:00

Vonda Gates has been an ICEA-certified childbirth educator since 1991 and serves as a national ICEA Approved Trainer (IAT) for both childbirth education and doula services. As a nurse she works with special needs children in the Black Hills area of South Dakota. Vonda has recently shared The HUG at a worshop in the wild west. Yes, she and 10 wonderful women cooked, talked, and studied in a ranch house on a large South Dekato bison operation. I can't stop smiling just knowing those bison were peeping through the window and learning how to give a HUG!

Vonda has just completed the Certified HUG Teacher program and shares this story with us all.

"Jean leans over the three month-old baby boy, her long brown hair brushing his cheeks and forehead. His arms and legs move with a jerky protest to her advance. As he turns his reddening face away, his mom repeats again, ”I don’t think James likes me.”

As a home health nurse for infants transitioning home after several months of NICU care, I am just getting to know this young client and his family. But when I met them at the hospital, before our venture home, my client’s mom has already expressed a concern that she was not sure her son likes her and she wonderes if he even knows she is his mom. Here, before the both of us, was her evidence: he turns away when she tries to be affectionate.

As a mother myself, that comment goes against everything I naturally know to be true. Babies don’t make that decision at this age, and her son’s behavior has more to do with normal newborn skills than a dislike for her affection.

I point out the many times Jean demonstrates skillful mothering care for her special needs child. She knows exactly what James needed when I had visited in the NICU. The oxygen had to be just so. He napped and oxygenated better on his right side, even though the logic of hospital staff said he should be placed on his left side related to the size of his lungs. He liked this music and these games. She had become the resident expert in her child’s care and had already demonstrated great passion as his best advocate.

Now I point out that her long hair was brushing his face and that his response was simply an "SOS", an infant’s Sign of Over Stimulation. This is not only a normal infant response but one that indicates he is a bright boy and knows how to reduce over-stimulation to calm himself. His behavior is his way of telling her that too much is going on when she comes close in that way. We watch again as my little client becomes agitated or "busy" when her hair falls across his face with another hug.

We agree to try an experiment and pull her hair back into a bun, realizing together that this is a way she can help her son in his efforts to calm himself. To offer more support for this fussy boy, we bring his busy hands to his chest and swaddle him as best we can, accommodating the surrounding vent circuit and wires. The wiggly hands and feet become quiet, and the red color leaves his cheeks. “Try calling his name, softly,” I suggest. There are smiles all around as James turns toward her face. “He knows his mommy’s voice,” I comment. “What a very bright boy!” I suggest that she try hugging him now. As she leans closer, James is accepting and quiet. With a calm affirmation to her voice, she says, “You do know I’m your mommy.”"

Read another story about premies and The HUG.

YEAH! I passed the IBCLC Exam!

2010-10-29T07:13:00.006-04:00

Celebrate with ladies of the world today who just became International Board Certified Lactation Consultants. (Since 1985, 30,000 individuals worldwide have been awarded this certification.)

For months I worked hard studying the anatomy and physiology of lactation, how babies develop in their abilites to suckle, what milk is made of, how we care for babies who struggle to nurse, and why breastfeeding saves the lives of millions every day! Some days I would wonder how something so "natural" could be so complicated! When I took the exam in July, I was one of the gals hoping that months of flash cards, study groups, and late night textbooking would do the trick!

Though I have worked with breastfeeding families for three decades, I have been amazed at how "handy" this new level of information is for me. The high incidence of c-section, obesity, gestational diabetes, and lack of family support makes lactation a challenge for many of the moms that I see at UNC. I look forward to continuing to translate book learning into real-life problem solving--one breastfeeding mom at a time!

NEW Certified HUG Teacher Helps An Experienced Mom Understand Her Baby's Sleep

2010-10-28T06:39:00.015-04:00

Kristin Cottom is a Family Life and Childbirth Educator at Mercy Regional Health Center in Manhattan, KS. As the most recent Certified HUG Teacher, she is eager to share her HUG concepts with new moms and dads through both her "Newborn Basics" and Infant Massage classes at her hospital. As chair of a local community coalition focusing on child development and new families, she will reach out with HUG Your Baby classes to the wider community.

Here is one of Kristin's recent teaching opportunities:

"Carrie, two-time mom of Jack (age 3 ½) and Caleb (age 1 month), attended my most recent HUG class. Carrie arrived to class early and stated that she had heard from a friend that this class offers great advice on helping with babies sleep issues. She goes on to explain that when Jack was a baby she loved to hold him when he slept, and that led to him sleeping with her and her husband in their bed until he was over 2 years of age. She wants to help Caleb develop healthy sleep patterns on his own so that he will not be as dependent on her to get to sleep and stay asleep. I praise Carrie for taking the time to attend my class and confirm that we will discuss babies and their sleep patterns during the PowerPoint and video sections of the class. I encourage Carrie to stay after class so that we can discuss the HUG’s sleep concepts further.

During class, as we cover information on Active/Light Sleep and Still/Deep Sleep (see video clips), I notice Carrie taking notes and nodding her head as if the information was just clicking. She also seemed to like the information on preparing baby for nighttime sleep.

After class, Carrie does stay to talk, and we further discuss the different types of sleep and how to prepare baby for sleep. Carrie admits that she never understood the different states of sleep and that now she can see how important it is to prepare baby for nighttime sleep with a quiet, calming environment. I schedule a follow-up visit with Carrie for three days after class. I encourage her to call me if she has questions, but I want her to use the HUG methods on her own first, and see how things go. Carrie likes this plan and is thankful for the offer to follow up.

When I arrive for our follow-up visit, Carrie is excited to tell me how well Caleb has been sleeping, both during nap and at nighttime. She describes how Caleb will work through the different sleep patterns and now, when he wakes up, he is rested and ready to eat and play. She is also proud of how he is sleeping in his own bed and going to sleep on his own. This mom has become a believer in the HUG principles and feels grateful for the information she has attained."

Here are two other stories on helping babies sleep well (Sleep and a newborn & Sleep and a 7-month-old.

Give The HUG to a 'Baby Blues Mom'", suggests a new Certified HUG Teacher.

2010-10-08T08:27:00.002-04:00

Pam McKimie is a Diplomat of the College of Physicians of the American Association of Integrative Medicine. Working with moms and dads of premature newborns is her passion.Her goal is to help as many families as possible understand that even during the toughest times, they can still interact and enjoy their baby in a nurturing and loving way, while at the same time, participating in the growth and development of their newborn! Learn more about her work here!

Here is Pam's story...

"We all know that having a new baby can be a stressful event, especially for a new mom. When she was pregnant, she was excited and busy preparing for the arrival of her “new bundle of joy”. But then, once the baby arrives, reality sets in….new responsibilities, lack of sleep, and having to manage the demands of day to day living, mom is feeling a bit over-whelmed.

While all of these new changes are taking place, mom is trying to establish a bond with her precious baby. Sometimes this can be difficult….every time mom wants to play with her “bundle of joy”, he turns away from her, and he is always fussy during breastfeeding!

HERE COMES THE EMOTIONAL ROLLERCOASTER KNOWN AS THE BABY BLUES…Changing hormones, new responsibilities, and feelings of rejection would give even the best mom the Blues!

This is a great time to give mom THE HUG! The HUG program helps new moms understand the unique language of their baby by learning the signs of over-stimulation (SOS), and the three newborn zones … the Resting, Ready, and Rebooting Zones.

Now mom and baby are communicating, and before you know it…Mom is playing with her baby, breastfeeding is going smoothly, mom and baby are sleeping better, and the demands of day to day life are much easier!

So the next time you see a mom with the “baby blues” give her The HUG!!"

Mother-Baby "HUGS" Are Especially for Cesarean Moms

2010-10-06T22:28:00.006-04:00

Guest author, Nicette Jukelevics, is a Childbirth Educator certified by the International Childbirth Education Association (ICEA) and Co-Founder of Center for Family in Torrance, California. She is the author of Understanding the Dangers of Cesarean Birth: Making Informed Decisions and hosts this educational website.

One of the most memorable and moving experiences I had years ago was providing labor support for a mother who ultimately needed to have a cesarean section. What Joanne mourned the most while preparations were being made for her surgery was not being able to hold her newborn in her arms. As we all understood, cesarean born babies were taken immediately by the staff, assessed to make sure they were stable and then put under a warming light in their bassinet. Hospital protocols required that cesarean born babies were observed for the first four hours in the nursery. That meant that Joanne would not embrace, talk to, or breastfeed her baby during that “golden hour” immediately after birth.

Joanne’s deep sense of loss seemed to me so distressing, and ultimately so unnecessary, that I told her and her husband that I would do something unusual once we were settled in the operating room. I would ask her physician if she could have her baby placed on her chest and one of her arms freed so that she could hold, touch, and speak with her newborn. When the epidural had taken effect and Dad was seated next to his partner, I softly asked, “Dr. Smith, if everything goes well and Joanne’s baby is in good health, can she have her newborn placed on her chest and given a minute or two to welcome her baby? It would mean so much to her.”

Dr. Smith and the operating room staff had never done this before, but they were willing to accommodate Joanne’s request if circumstances allowed it.

At birth, Joanne’s baby had a good Apgar score. Joanne and her husband watched intently as the staff cared for their newborn. The nurse assured them both that as soon as he was wrapped in a warm blanket, and a knitted cap was placed on his head to keep off the chill of the operating room, their son would be ready to meet them.

Nothing can compare with the happiness and joy I witnessed that day. The nurse brought Joanne’s baby over to the operating table and placed her son tummy-down on her chest. Another nurse released one of her arms. Both parents were able to caress their newborn son, speak softly in his ear, and reassure him that everything was going to be alright. They would be reunited very soon after a short stay in the newborn nursery. Given the chance to hold, caress, and greet her son after her cesarean gave Joanne the confidence, patience, and readiness to better understand her baby’s needs.

Birth by cesarean affects mothers as well as their babies. A long labor preceding a cesarean, pain from the surgery, or complications such as developing a fever, an infection or a reaction to medications, may make it difficult for a mother to be with her baby right after birth.

Holding, feeding, and soothing her baby may be more painful than she anticipated. Mom and baby will benefit from skin-to-skin contact and rooming in (having the baby in mom’s room as opposed to the nursery) as soon as possible. But, mothers should also take the time they need to feel ready to welcome their baby.

In my childbirth classes, this is what I suggest to expectant mothers who may need to have a cesarean:

1. Ask to have an epidural or spinal anesthesia instead of general anesthesia. Regional anesthesia has fewer side effects and gives you both a chance to be together sooner after birth.
2. In the operating room, after your baby has been born and if you are feeling well, ask that one of your arms be released and that your baby be placed belly-down on your chest as soon as it is safe. You can also ask that the baby be placed skin-to-skin with your partner as soon as it is safe. Your baby will be less fussy and more ready to breastfeed.
3. Ask that a lactation specialist help you to recognize your baby’s hunger signs, to position your baby to latch on correctly at your breast, to support you to continue to breastfeed while in the hospital, and to provide you with a list of community resources that you can access once you are home.
4. Your health insurance may reimburse you for the services of a lactation consultant once you are home and for the rental of a breast pump, if you need one.
5. You may want to draft a birth plan to communicate your needs and wishes for staff support with breastfeeding.
6. You will be in pain after the initial anesthetic wears off. Ask about the safest pain medication available for breastfeeding.
7. Ask for your partner, friend, or doula to stay with you in the room to help you lift your baby, change positions in bed, change the baby’s diapers, and help you get out of bed.

Over the years, I have found that mothers who are prepared for the possibility of a cesarean, and who take time to speak to their care providers about what is important to them, are better ready to “HUG” their babies soon after they are born!

Certified HUG Teacher Shares the Power of The HUG!

2010-10-03T20:04:00.004-04:00

Mary Kling is a nutritionist in an OB clinic in Atco, New Jersey and has had her own postpartum doula business since 2006. (Click here for her website.) Mary has just become a Certified HUG Teacher and is delighted to share this story.

Corrie is a dedicated career woman who finally becomes a mom. After losing a baby at birth two years ago, she is especially eager to do whatever she needs to for her new baby, Marla. Marla is born by c-section at 37 weeks. The doctor instructs Corrie to nurse Marla every two hours, and Corrie does so carefully, recording every nursing session, pee and poop.

Marla is in deep sleep when Corrie picks her up. Today it takes a half hour to get the baby to her breast, yet Mom is persistent and uncomplaining. Wanting to reinforce the doctor’s orders, I encourage Corrie and wait patiently for an opportunity to guide this new mom.

When I visit two-week-old Marla a second time, I learn that the baby has gained back her birth weight and that the doctor is pleased. Corrie excitedly tells me all about her doctor’s visit, then glances at the clock. Two hours have passed since the last feeding. “When can I stop this?” she finally asks.

“Now,” I reply. “Let’s watch Marla and see when she’s ready to eat. If she gets to the third hour, we’ll wake her up.”

Mom looks like a weight has fallen off her shoulders. She sits back, and we wait and watch together. In half an hour Marla wiggles and squirms, wakes up and actively looks for Mom. Corrie happily picks her up and nurses with confidence.

Just in time for the busy Easter holiday, I talk to Corrie about The HUG SOSs (Signs of Over-Stimulation). Mom now understands new ways of knowing when Marla has had enough excitement, as well as how to comfort the baby. By Monday Corrie is beaming as she describes her ability not only to see those SOS but also to respond by retreating for a few minutes while she and baby regroup. We all agree, “We sure do love The HUG!”

HUG Your Baby goes to Bermuda!

2010-09-14T21:53:00.007-04:00

My name is Katrina Ball. I have a very supportive husband and am a mother to a 19 month-old named Elijah. The birth of my son motivated me to serve and educate women going through this same, wonderful time in their lives. During the birth of my son and during the early months of his life, I had great support from family, but I would have gained so much more confidence and knowledge had I experienced the type of support I am now able to give others.

I am a Certified Baby Planner through the International Academy of Baby Planner Professionals and am currently awaiting my certificate as a Birth Doula. In addition, I am working towards certification as a Postpartum Doula, a Childbirth Educator, and a Breastfeeding Counselor through Childbirth International. Having attended several births as a birth doula, I am seriously giving thought to studying midwifery as well.

In Bermuda I have started a Professional Baby Planning and Childbirth Service called Mindful Mothering Along with the childbirth classes I teach, I also wanted to teach a newborn class, and that's how I discovered The HUG program. I immediately resonated with it and have chosen this program to use in the newborn classes I teach. I have also begun to use the HUG priniciples as a doula and breastfeeding educator.

Recently, I attended a birth and noticed the mom needed some special help when her baby started getting fussy. I brought his hands to his chest and gave the shushing sound, and he quieted down immediately. It is wonderful to see The HUG in action already!

New Parent Educator Finds a Home for The HUG in Her Hospital

2010-08-30T20:08:00.006-04:00

Guest author, Kaye C. Kennamer, RN, BSN, LCCE, is a new Certified HUG Teacher. She has worked for years as a nurse, childbirth, and parent educator and really know what makes parents tick! Kaye has integrated The HUG into her work with young families and is excited about the feedback she is hearing.

"As a registered nurse and long time Lamaze Certified Childbirth Educator, I was extremely delighted to discover The HUG. The HUG program is a wonderful tool to help health care professionals explain the various infant states to new parents. Helping new parents recognize how their newborn actually communicates with them through subtle curs helps to increase the parents’ confidence level in their abilities to meet and satisfy their newborns’ needs.

"I have used the DVD in several of my parenting classes and have enjoyed the positive reception the video has received. My duties as Patient/Community Educator at my local hospital include daily rounding times with all the breastfeeding mothers. On several occasions, I have encountered couples who attended my classes and viewed The HUG prenatally. These parents were already beginning to recognize the differences between deep/quiet sleep and light/active sleep, as well as demonstrating how to appropriately respond to their infants S.O.S! Quite a few parents have also requested to watch the video again in their room during their postpartum stay in the hospital.

The HUG has proven to be an effective educational tool, which I plan to incorporate into our expectant parent curriculum. Coworkers who have viewed the video also wholeheartedly tout its effectiveness. Additionally, I hope to stockpile an ample supply of The HUG DVD’s, for individual purchase, in our hospital gift shop!"

Certified HUG Teacher touches lives of Many New Moms!

2010-08-22T18:26:00.007-04:00

Kay Miller (Claycomo, MO) is nurse and CAPPA doula AND a remarkable woman. Her work with new parents is broad and wide and has expanded as her children (age 14, and 11) become a bit older. She does private doula work, works at a birth center, and works at a crisis pregnancy center. At this center Kay has the opportunity to have 1-4 weekly visits a month with women during their pregnancy and up until the baby is one year old. Just imagine how many HUGS she gets to give! Congratulations on her recent HUG Teacher Certification.

Here is her story:
"I recently served as a doula for a wonderful mom. Not long after the birth, Mom emailed me to let me know that baby wasn't sleeping well. He reportedly was only sleeping for about an hour at a time, then would get fussy. Mom would pick him up and attempt to breastfeed. She was getting little sleep, was frustrated, and had sore nipples. I told her that I had just the thing to help her, and that we would discuss it at our postpartum visit the following day.

When I visited the mom and baby, I brought my HUG DVD with me. I let mom talk about what had been going on, and observed baby’s actions. I then discussed the different actions that I noted, such as baby squirming, turning head from side to side, self comforting measures, sucking, etc. I pointed out these actions and shared with mom how the actions were normal, and that she could learn to recognize his cues and respond accordingly.

Mom handed baby over to me so I could have some time with him. He had been fussy and seemed a little agitated with mom. He spaced out for a few seconds and I just gave him some time to adjust. Then I softly called his name and began to talk with him. Mom was amazed when he calmed down, and absolutely delighted when he turned on his charm for me.

Baby soon decided it was time to eat, so mom brought him to the breast. I pointed out how well she did bringing him skin to skin, positioning him, waiting for baby to open his mouth wide to get a good latch. We also discussed different positions she could use during breastfeeding.

Not long after his feeding, baby decided that it was time to sleep. This brought up the perfect opportunity for us to watch the HUG DVD and to discuss it further. I really hit on the active/light sleep and still/deep sleep patterns since mom was concerned with baby’s sleeping. While I was there, baby came to the active/light sleep, which provided the opportunity for me to point out his movements and noises, and explain to mom that this was normal and expected behavior. We watched him for a few minutes, leaving him undisturbed, and he eventually fell back in to his still/deep sleep. Mom breathed a sigh of relief. I gave her the HUG website and some other resources to check in to, and soon ended the visit.

I contacted mom a few days later to check on her and the baby. She told me that baby was doing much better. She felt that she was able to recognize his zones and SOSs. She said that he was sleeping better and eating well. She said that she was able to get a long stretch of sleep every night, because she was able to recognize when he was in active/light sleep and when he was really awake. She thanked me again for sharing information and techniques with her to help her and baby, and for helping her get a good night’s sleep!"

© HUG Your Baby 2010

Discover..."You Are My World"

2010-08-22T16:57:00.004-04:00

Professional conferences always introduce me to new people, new ideas, new products, and new inspirations. Such an introduction occured at CAPPA 2010 (Charlotte, NC) this month. One of this year's inspirations was the new book, You Are My World , by Amy Hatkoff.

This sweet little book captures both that precious tone and those subtle truths which become part of a new parent's life. Short "messages" from a newborn share the page with lovely black and white photographs:

When I can count on you, I learn to trust.
When you kiss my boo-boos, you teach me how to be kind toward others.
When you get excited about me, I get excited about life.

In a family-friendly way Ms. Hatkoff presents the importance of how attachment and reading a baby's body language impact a baby's developing brain. Her content reminds us in pictures and words of the wisdom of Erikson(about trust), of Bowlby (about bonding), of McClure (on the power of touch) and of Pruett (on fathering). Her closing phrase, Your love prepares me for the journey reinforces the importance of what you and I do every day for the families we serve.

NEW Certified HUG Teacher Speaks Out!

2010-08-19T16:13:00.018-04:00

Trudie Jones, originally from England, now lives and works as a busy Birth Doula in Ft. Laduerdale, Florida. She has recently completed the Certified HUG Teacher program and is eager to share her "HUGS" with others!

Trudie wants to tell us this story...

I had assisted Maria and Alex at the birth of their first baby, and here we are with baby #2--a beautiful, healthy, little boy. The birth was perfect, the atmosphere calm and serene as Marie welcomed her baby into the world.

The following day I went to visit the new family at the hospital; it was lovely to see the big brother kissing and cuddling the baby, to hear everyone talking about how wonderful Maria had done, and to listen to the grandmas exchanging their own birth stories. In fact, the room was very lively with conversations.

Big Brother started to call out that his little brother did not like him. “Look how he keeps looking away from me. Every time I call his name he turns the other way!” the brother exclaims. Maria explained, “He’s been doing that on and off all day; then he starts screaming for no reason.” Within a few minutes the baby had gone from showing SOSs (signs of over stimulation) to rebooting (fussing, crying). He was really letting everyone hear what a great pair of lungs he had!

I asked if I could help calm the baby down. I gently called his name and put his hands to his chest. As I was applying these techniques, I briefly explained how the baby was just letting us know that it was all a little too much. He was over- stimulated and needed a little help in calming himself down. Everyone was amazed at how quickly the baby settled down and went back to sleep. Naturally, more information was requested, so I arranged to attend the home in a few days, to explain "Zones" in more detail and let them see the HUG DVD.

As promised, I arrived on Day 5. Mum, Dad, Grandma, Big Brother and, of course, the baby were all present. Everyone was doing well. Baby had just been fed and was responding to Grandma and Big Brother. The baby actually looked like he could understand all that was being said to him. Grandma was saying how smart he was as he showed us he was able to follow Grandma's voice. In the middle of talking to baby, the baby started to look like he was staring into space and simply stopped paying attention to "Gran." Then he began to get a little fussy. He made a grunting sound, and then started to move his arms and legs in a jerky way. Mum observed this and stated, “Oh, he must still be hungry, although I only fed him a half hour ago.” I explained that this was another SOS. I swaddled the baby, gently swayed him, and again he settled down.

While the baby slept, we talked about the different "Zones" in detail, how to recognize SOSs, and how to calm baby down. We also talked about the different sleep states. We watched for the "Ready Zone," when it might be the best time for Big Brother to have play time with baby. Finally we watched the HUG DVD.

The family was surprised at how much information they had gained. Marie stated, “If only I had know this with my first baby, life could have been so much easier!” Gran responded, “Don’t feel bad. I had five children and knew none of this. I just thought all new babies cried all the time. If they slept for more than 30 minutes I was doing really well.” And what about Dad? He’s just happy and proud of his smart children and wonderful wife.

© HUG Your Baby 2010

"Touchpoints" in Everyday Life

2010-08-14T14:23:00.007-04:00

As I enter the room Keema, Katherine's energetic eleven month old, is standing beside mom's chair. As I walk into the room Keema momentarily turns toward and glances at her mom before reaching a chubby hand in my direction. She takes two wobbly steps toward the exam table where she then goes on about her business of exploring the chair, nearby drawer, and rolling stool. I seem to bore her right now.

Mom looks tired as she leans over, picks up and undresses her daughter to show me her summer-time diaper rash. Keema twist and squirms on the table communicating quite clearly that she was not done with her investigation of the room and her practice walking.

The diaper rash is easy to care for. Hearing and responding to mom's concern about her daughter's behavior is more challenging.

Katherine describes a long weekend in Richmond at her favorite family reunion. She explains that her family reunions get bigger every year as sisters, cousins, and nieces become new moms. Last year Keema had gone as a newborn and mom had enjoyed the extra attention she and the baby has gotten as well as the special rest she had received in this community of loved ones.

This vacation was different. Keema would go to bed as usual, then cry 2-3 times at night (something all family members did not appreciate!) Mom would find her standing in her crib "looking like she was really mad 'cause she couldn't figure out how to lay back down." Katherine has already appreciated that her girl was "strong willed and has a mind of her own." But Katherine explains that her daughter seemed more out of sorts this past week and did not call forth the same adoration for family members as mom had experienced the year before. "This reunion seems more like 'work' than 'vacation' and I'm just plain worn out."

This is a Touchpoints moment and an opportunity for me to connect significantly with this mom . As I watch Keema toddle around the room I reflect on her activity. "She has that wide-based gait of a new walker and hold her arms rather stifly in order to keep her balance. She almost lunges from one hand hold to the next and doesn't mind a few tumbles to the floor, " I say. Mom giggles at all the details of this newest milestone and perks up quickly as I go own to explain the concept of how a developmental surge like this almost always impacts a child sleep for a week or two. We discussed the how mom could help her practice getting back down from standing during the day so her girl would not be so frustrated at night. In addition we discussed that "A, B, C" (Attention that is Boring AND Caring") approach to night-time parenting of the toddler. (See upcoming blog on this "A,B,C").

Mom laughs and rubs her baby's curly head. I can just imagine how this new information will play out at nest Sunday's mom-to-mom family brunch. This young mom will be the newest "expert" as she shares how these temporary "ups and downs" at night are just proof of her child's normal and dynamic development.

© HUG Your Baby 2010

"Don't ever doubt - one small group can change the world!"

2010-07-29T00:10:00.002-04:00

I sat in a room with a hundred or so women from North Carolina who are determined to change the world! Isn't that what we do when we support one new mom and one tiny baby to find one another in the breastfeeding experience?

Today I remembered the timeless words of Margaret Mead,

"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has."

Ms. Mead's words inspired this lovely song, "I Give Thanks" (blog below), by Kathryn Mostow. Tap your foot and let your heart sing as hers does!

I Give Thanks

2010-07-28T23:59:00.000-04:00

HUG Your Baby goes to India!

2010-07-28T19:17:00.003-04:00

Celebrate with Us!

2010-07-26T21:23:00.003-04:00

Husband, Jim, bought some roses to celebrate all the ladies of the world who took the International Lactation Consultant Exam today. (Since 1985, 30,000 individuals worldwide have been awarded this certification.) I was one of the gals hoping that months of flash cards, study groups, and late night textbooking did the trick!

For months now I have been hard at work studying the anatomy and physiology of lactation, how babies develop in their abilites to suckle, what milk is made of, how we care for babies who struggle to nurse, and why breastfeeding saves the lives of millions every day! Some days I would wonder how something so "natural" could be so complicated!

Though I have worked with breastfeeding families for three decades, I was amazed at how "handy" this new level of information has become for me. The high incidence of c-section, obesity, gestational diabetes, and lack of family support makes lactation a challenge for many moms that I see at UNC. I look forward to continuing to translate book learning into real-life problem solving.

Everybody who studied hard for the exam today can celebrate all that we learned and that we will share with those we serve--and hope that the universe rewards us with a "pass" in October!

"Preventing Obesity Begins at Birth with Breastfeeding"

2010-07-20T23:51:00.001-04:00

Washington, DC—As First Lady Michelle Obama launches her campaign to fight childhood obesity, the United States Breastfeeding Committee (USBC) reminds the public, health care professionals, and educators that obesity prevention begins at the earliest moments of life when parents make infant feeding decisions. Breastfeeding has been shown to have an impact on obesity throughout the life span, while also contributing to numerous other positive health outcomes.

...Read On

The Baby is a Teacher for Us ALL!

2010-07-10T22:35:00.009-04:00

GUEST AUTHOR:

Jan Wells, new Certified HUG Teacher, massage therapist, and very proud Grandma from Cary, North Carolina, shares a HUG Your Baby moment!

Julie’s sister, Camry, is visiting when I stop by to spend some time with Julie, her husband Jim, and their beautiful, two-week-old daughter, Avery. Julie had called a few days earlier; she had heard about HUG Your Baby from a friend, and she and Jim were feeling a bit overwhelmed.

Avery is a great baby, but after all the new-baby visits and all the advice they received from well-meaning relatives and friends, Julie and Jim have begun to doubt their abilities as new parents. They need reassurance that they are doing a great job already.

I invite Camry, who was close to delivering herself, to join us, but she politely declines. “Thanks, but this is my second baby. I know all there is to know about babies!"

As I set up, Avery is just beginning to arouse from her morning nap. Out of the corner of my eye, I see her parents go to her crib.

Smiling at her parents’ innocent intuitiveness, I explain that babies have two sleep states which they cycle through about every 50-80 minutes: light/active sleep, and deep/quiet sleep. In their active sleep, they will often appear awake; they may smile and coo or fuss a bit. Their eyes may even open. Giving Avery time to figure out what she wants is a great idea, I tell Julie and Jim. If it is time to feed her, helping her wake up from active sleep is perfect.

Rather than scooping her up right away, Jim quietly watches for a minute. “I've noticed that sometimes, if we let her lie there a second,” he whispers, “she’ll actually put herself back to sleep! It’s really weird, but she does it. I guess she needs a few minutes more of sleep.”

“And if it’s time for a feeding, we will get her up. She feeds better than if we rouse her out of that deep sleep you mentioned.," Julie explains. “When we do need to help her wake up we call her name softly. That almost always helps her wake up to where she's much more ready to eat, get a diaper change, or even play.”

Today, Avery chooses to go back to sleep, and soon we hear her tiny, deep rhythmic breaths; she has transitioned back into a deep sleep, a time when her little body concentrates on growing.

As we continue to talk, I see Jim and Julie’s confidence as parents return. The suggestions about swaddling and bringing Avery’s arms to her chest when she fusses make sense to them. “We’ll definitely add those to our ‘bag of tricks’!” Julie says. When Avery finally wakes up, Jim is all set to play a follow-the-ball game with Avery that we watched on the HUG Your Baby DVD. "I didn't know you could play with a two-week-old!” Jim exclaims.

A few weeks later, when I return to show some infant massage and movement techniques, all are doing well. “Avery is really getting good at calming herself, and now we know how to help her everytime she needs us,” Jim says. Julie adds that Avery is a wonderful teacher for them. “How smart she already is!

And by the way, my sister Camry just called to see if she could borrow our HUG DVD; it seems that her second baby is even more of a handful than her first!”

A New Mom becomes the Teacher

2010-07-10T22:27:00.014-04:00

Another great story from Certfied HUG Teacher and doula, Leslie Gallimore, from Charlotte, NC.

Lana faithfully attended classes prior to the birth of her son. A single mom and full-time college student, she often said that the classes were both informative and a place of support. During her pregnancy, she shared that she would be traveling quite a bit to see her family and hoped her baby would be a good traveler.

HUG Your Baby was one of the classes shared during the course of her pregnancy. Lana watched the video, heard the PowerPoint information, and embraced the concepts of observing her baby’s signals in order to better know how to meet his needs and to understand him. It is not surprising that she was also quite observant of his behavior prior to his birth. She recognised his actvity inside and anticipated times he'd be on the move out in the world.

Lana came back to view The HUG DVD again before her baby arrived in order to be as prepared as possible when her son arrived. She said she was looking forward to the day when she would look into her son’s eyes and hear his voice.

Following the birth of Sean, Lana returned to class to introduce her son to the women with whom she had shared so much during pregnancy. What a joy to hear her share her early experiences as a mom. She told her classmates that she had learned to fully wake him up prior to breastfeeding.

Sean began to skirm in her arms and whimper slightly. What a joy it was to watch as Lana very calmly, smoothly and naturally reached for Sean’s hands and held them to his chest. The baby immediately settled. Lana explained that she had tried swaddling but found this hand-holding calming tool to be really helpful.

Lana was delighted to share that she had already made a three hour trip with her baby. With the aid of a mirror directed where she could observe him those sleep/awake transitions she had learned about on the DVD. At the times that Sean was actually waking, she said she watched to see if he was content and quiet or if he seemed to need calming. When he needed more than she could do while driving, she would find a place to pull over and remove him from his carseat.

I held Sean and asked Lana to softly say his name. He opened his eyes wide, turned to his mom and looked at her face. What fun for the rest of us to see the huge smile on Lana’s face and to sense her love for her son!

"That's MY Baby!"

2010-07-10T15:44:00.008-04:00

Guest author:

Leslie Gallimore, a doula and Certified HUG Teacher in Charlotte, North Carolina, offers this important story!

Erica brought two-week old Carmen to visit me. She had attended the classes I teach prior to the birth of her precious baby girl. Erica’s mom accompanied the two of them because Erica was not supposed to be driving yet.

As Erica held Carmen and we talked, Carmen demonstrated an SOS. Her face turned red, her arms and legs moved in a somewhat jerky manner. I suggested that Erica should hold Carmen’s hands to her chest. The baby looked at her mom and began to settle. Erica smiled and said, “What a smart baby!"

I held Carmen and asked Erica to say her name. Carmen grew still and turned in the direction of her mother. Carmen’s grandmother smiled and nodded. I suggested that she also say Carmen’s name. Much to this grandmother’s delight, Carmen turned toward her as well. Carmen’s grandmother took her from me, hugged her close and said, “That’s my baby!”

Breastfeeding Support for Muslim Women

2010-07-01T20:33:00.001-04:00

"Touchpoints" in Everyday Life

2010-06-22T22:08:00.004-04:00

As I enter the room Keema, Katherine's energetic eleven month old, is standing beside mom's chair. As I walk into the room Keema momentarily turns toward and glances at her mom before reaching a cubby hand in my direction. She takes two wobbly steps toward the exam table where she then goes on about her business of exploring the chair, nearby drawer, and rolling stool. I seem to bore her right now.

Mom looks tired as she leans over, picks up and undresses her daughter to show me her summer-time diaper rash. Keema twist and squirms on the table communicating quite clearly that she was not done with her investigation of the room and her practice walking.

The diaper rash is easy to care for. Hearing and responding to mom's concern about her daughter's behavior is more challenging.

Katherine describes a long weekend in Richmond at her favorite family reunion. She explains that her family reunions get bigger every year as sisters, cousins, and neices become new moms. Last year Keema had gone as a newborn and mom had enjoyed the extra attention she and the baby has gotten as well as the special rest she had received in this community of loved ones.

This vacation was different. Keema would go to bed as usual, then cry 2-3 times at night (somthing all family members did not appreciate!) Mom would find her standing in her crib "looking like she was really mad 'cause she couldn't figure out how to lay back down." Katherine has already appreciated that her girl was "strong willed and has a mind of her own." But Katherine explains that her daughter seemed more out of sorts this past week and did not call forth the same adoration for family members as mom had experienced the year before. "This reunion seems more like 'work' than 'vacation' and I'm just plain worn out."

This is a Touchpoints moment and an opportunity for me to connect significantly with this mom . As I watch Keema toddle around the room I reflect on her activity. "She has that wide-based gait of a new walker and hold her arms rather stifly in order to keep her balance. She almost lunges from one hand hold to the next and doesn't mind a few tumbles to the floor, " I say. Mom gigles at all the details of this newest milestone and perks up quickly as I go own to explain the concept of how a develpments surge like this almost always impacts a child sleep for a week or two. We discussed the how mom could help her practice getting back down from standing during the day so her girl would not be so frustrated at night. In addition we discussed that "A, B, C" (Attention that is Boring AND Caring") approach to night-time parenting of the toddler.

Mom laughs and rubs her baby's curly head. I can just imagine how this new information will play out at nest Sunday's mom-to-mom family bruch. This young mom will be the newest "expert" as she shares how these temporary "ups and downs" at night are just proof of her child's normal and dynamic development.

Keeping Moms and Babies Alive

2010-06-21T01:29:00.003-04:00

Inspiring new article tells it like it is. The very lives of women and children are in jeopardy in the US and around the world. Helping parents love and care for their offspring is what I spend my days doing. But, clearly this work is in vain if the mothers die trying to bring these children into the world!

Thank you to ICEA for this recent article. I hope lives will be changed by the reading of it.

Connecting with this Teen Mom

2010-06-19T07:22:00.001-04:00

It saddened me when I walked into the room. Carrie, a sixteen-year-old new mom, was gazing out the window - at nothing in particular. Just gazing out, not looking in, or over at the baby in the room. Grandma sat beside the exam table and patted the back of three-week-old Ricky, a healthy, full-term guy who appeared to be under the watchful care of his grandmother. I asked questions about the delivery and feeding. I commented on the little one's abundance of hair and his sweet nose. I mused over the wonder of a new baby. But Carrie still glanced out the window, unengaged by the swirl of attention her newborn was receiving.

Ricky began to squirm on the exam table, wrinkle up his face, and hover on the verge of changing from a calm to a fussy baby. As he wiggled he seemed, quite by accident, to hit the side of his face with his fisted hand. This movement triggered his in-born rooting reflex. His tiny mouth opened wide and clamped down on his first and second finger. He started to suck.

"Wow!" I exclaimed. "Look how smart you are to get that finger in your mouth all by yourself!"

Carrie was jolted by my enthusiastic response. She pushed her chair a few inches away from the window and turned her head a full 20 degrees in our direction.

I chatted on in my nurse-to-baby style, next noticing Ricky's eyes turning to focus on me. "My goodness! You heard my voice and turned right toward me! What other amazing tricks do you have?"

Carrie eased toward the exam table and, now, glanced down at Ricky. Her son demonstrated an amazing ability to get to and stay in that Ready Zone. His eyes were bright, his movements relaxed, and his shoulders dropped in an "I'm-ready-for-the-next-event" kind of look.

I picked up Ricky and encouraged Carrie to call his name. She did, at first tentatively, but with a bit more gusto after some encouragement. As I expected, Ricky slowly turned in his mother's direction, and then he looked into her face, contentedly.

A smile crept over Carrie's face as she looked down at her child. With some hesitation she received the newborn I gently placed in her arms. Carrie surprised me when she put her nose into Ricky's face and nuzzled for a moment. Ricky seemed to tilt toward his mom and into an awkward, but warm, cuddle.

Helping this new and fragile mom appreciate her baby's effort to connect made my day. "He's a real person," Carrie whispered.

"Yes, and he knows his real mother," I responded. Now, I didn't feel so sad.

Sword Fighting at such a Young Age!

2010-06-19T07:05:00.001-04:00

Chris was two weeks old and already seemed like a rambunctious boy to his parents! He was always "on the go." He would wiggle when Mom would bring him to the breast to nurse. An arm might shoot out, a foot jerk, and his mouth would move quickly from side to side as Mom tried to get him to nurse. He was sure to squirm on Dad's shoulder and bobble his head up and down as Dad did his burping duty. Lie him on his back to rest and both arms would splay out in a startle and his feet would start pumping as if he were leading a baby aerobics class. Chris was always moving!

When Chris would get upset, he would sometimes do the oddest thing. His arms and legs would pump a moment, then all of a sudden he would turn his head toward the right and look like he was taking up sword fighting. He would extend his right arm and leg, and flex his left leg and arm. This sword fighting position would seem to calm him down. From this position Chris could watch his own hand move and practice his eye-hand coordination. He might even pull his hand to his mouth to comfort himself from this position.

This position is technically called the "Fencing Reflex." It lasts in babies until they are 3-6 months old. Because the newborn's neck muscles are still strengthening and the back of the head is round, many babies will tend to tilt their head to the side when on their back. The majority of babies turn toward their right, which some suggest is caused by (or leads to) more right-handed than left-handed children. Most righted-handed mothers hold their baby in their left arm which allows mom to use her right hand easier and encourages the baby to look up at mom as he turns naturally toward the right.

No one would say that Chris assumed the sword fighting position on purpose, but researchers are learning daily how newborn reflexes serve a purpose. When Chris's parents watch him successfully use this reflex, they are reminded once again how remarkable newborns are and how especially smart their little ZORRO is!

A Soldier is Birthing Babies...and Getting Dads On Board!

2010-06-19T06:55:00.003-04:00

I admit I was suspicious when I saw that a man was listed as a speaker at the "Art of Breastfeeding" conference. He is not only a Certified Nurse Midwife but also a lactation consultant! And he does it all for the US Army.

Maj. Jarold Johnston was an inspiration as he described his philosophy and the techniques he uses to get dads-to-be to participate fully in the breastfeeding experience. "Sometimes it helps that I'm a soldier. I just tell the dads: 'Moms have a job, babies have a job, and dads have a job too. Get on with it!'"

Maj. Johnston believes that his job as a breastfeeding expert is to teach dads to be the in-home expert. "Dads have a good vantage point. The new mom is looking down at her breast and the baby, but the dad can see the mom's nipple, the baby's chin, the baby's cheeks from the side, the bottom, or the top - whatever it takes." "Most Army guys are mechanically inclined," he explains. "They like the challenge of figuring out the mechanics of what's working or not."

Mothers love the help. Dads might get good at changing diapers, but a "breastfeeding dad" has more important things to do! "Besides," Major Johnston says, "I tell them the truth - a successful breastfeeding mom resumes sexual activity quicker than do bottle-feeding moms...Yep - even the 82nd Airborne is on board now!"

"My baby doesn't like my milk!"

2010-06-06T19:20:00.007-04:00

“Asha doesn't like my milk!" the young mother declares. "It must not be strong enough for her. I guess it's time for formula."

Her words are a surprise to me. Four-week-old Asha had regained her birth weight in just ten days and was now growing at a great, one ounce-per-day clip. I see her cheeks beginning to fill out, and she is "filling" her diapers with gusto. Why is this mother thinking that her breastfeeding is going poorly?

"She just doesn't seem satisfied," Asha's mother explains. After a deep sigh, this young mother adds, “and she seems to be fussier this week.”

At the baby’s two-week-old weight check I had shared with Mom evidence that breastfeeding was going well. I commented on the baby’s effective, painless latch and the sound of milk being swallowed. I applauded Mom’s careful recording of wet and stooled diapers, and I pointed to the baby’s achievements on the growth chart. Though today I am tempted to begin by reviewing these signs again, I hesitate. I am suspicious that Asha's mom is concerned about the baby’s non-feeding behavior and projecting those concerns onto her breastfeeding experience.
  
I am prepared for this moment. In recent months I have studied the medical literature on breastfeeding duration and have learned that many women give up nursing their baby after misinterpreting a baby’s normal behavior. Writings by Donna Karl, RN, PNP, explain that a mother will see her baby as "satisfied" when she observes particular newborn behaviors, many of which are not related to feeding. A mother wants to see her baby become alert and gaze deeply into her eyes. She wants to calm her baby effectively and doesn't want her baby to appear irritable or difficult to console. Mothers want the hard work of parenting acknowledged by seeing her baby respond to HER.

Instead of focusing on the milestones of effective breastfeeding, I recognize the need to broaden my breastfeeding support by reflecting on the baby’s behavior.

When Asha’s mother moves her from the baby carrier to her lap, I avoid general statements like, “She looks happy with you.” Instead, I describe Asha’s specific behavior. “Her skin is pink, and her breathing is relaxed and regular.” As the mother talks quietly to her baby, I remark, “When you talk to your baby her forehead relaxes, her eyes widen, and her eyebrows go up.” A moment later I go on, “When you speak, she lifts her face toward yours and moves her arms in smooth circles over her head—almost like she’s dancing with you.”

I ask if Mom might want to see Asha play some baby “games.” Mom smiles and hands me the baby. Because Asha is now beginning to look a little drowsy, I sway her gently to bring her to the more fully alert, “Ready Zone.” The baby’s eyes brighten and she looks intently at my red rattle, held just ten inches from her face. Slowly I shake the rattle and watch as the baby’s eyes follow the toy intently from one side to the other. Asha's mom giggles and remarks, "She's really smart, I guess!"

Holding Asha near her mother’s face, I encourage the young mother to call her baby's name. Asha initially gets still when she hears her mother’s voice, and then her eyes seem to shift toward her mother. Mom is delighted to see her daughter actually turn her head slowly in her mom's direction and then notices how their eyes “lock” in an endearing gaze. With a big grin the mother lifts the baby from my hands and snuggles her face into the crease of the baby's soft neck. One of Mom's hands go to her breast to suppress the unexpected let down of milk.   

Having received this broader appreciation of her baby’s behavior, Mom now seems able to “hear” feedback about normal infant behavior and reassurance about breastfeeding. I discuss the change in crying patterns of babies this age, and I help mom practice some comforting techniques. I describe the developing sleep patterns and also point out that “active sleep” can be confused with a baby waking up. I review a baby’s growing ability to interact and mention how at times she might demonstrate some “SOSs” – Signs of Over-Stimulation. Before Asha and her mom leave I remind the mother of all the evidence (pees, poops, weight gain) that her nursing is going great.

Three months later, Asha's mom is a breastfeeding star and an advocate for other new moms. One afternoon she comes to my breastfeeding class to discuss the challenges and joys of breastfeeding. Cuddling with her busy baby, she remarks "Don't just count those pees and poops. Learn about the amazing abilities of your newborn and you'll know for sure that your breastmilk is perfect!"

© HUG Your Baby 2011

HUG Your Baby goes to Ghana!

2010-06-02T19:26:00.003-04:00

HUG Your Baby donates The HUG DVD to this important project!

"Born and raised in Ghana, Africa, Linda works as a midwife in the small hospital that she and her husband, an OB/GYN, opened last May. She is licensed as a State Registered Nurse as well as a State Registered Midwife. Her current load includes attending about 2 births a week, serving as General Manager, Human Resource Manager, and Executive Director of the hospital,teaching childbirth classes every Saturday and more! Talk about multi-tasking!!!"
Read on in CAPPA Newsletter!

Helping Baby Sleep at Night

2010-05-30T09:10:00.000-04:00

Newly Certified HUG Teacher offers Her Expertise!

2010-05-15T18:21:00.003-04:00

Pam Diamond (on right) is a mother and baby specialist and a Certified HUG Teacher in Cary, North Carolina. She owns First Daze & NightZzz, postpartum doula services and baby sleep consulting.http://firstdaze.com

Perry (the mom on the left) recently moved to this area, and is desperate for support in getting her daughter to nap and sleep without being attached to the breast. “I am depressed and do not feel like a very good mom,” she says. “I have failed my little girl who suffers every time I am not available.” Perry explains that early on she relished the closeness and connection that came with snuggling and nursing her baby during naps and bedtime. But at seven months her daughter needs to have mom's nipple in her mouth during EVERY nap and ALL NIGHT LONG! Mom is beginning to resent her daughter and knew something has to change.

READ ON...

Certified HUG Teacher shares the power of a HUG!

2010-05-10T20:58:00.006-04:00

Mary Kling is a nutritionist and Certified HUG Teacher in Atco, New Jersey, USA.

Corrie is a dedicated career woman who finally becomes a mom. After losing a baby at birth two years ago, she is especially eager to do whatever she needs to for her new baby, Marla. Marla is born by c-section at 37 weeks. The doctor instructs Corrie to nurse Marla every two hours, and Corrie does so carefully, recording every nursing session, pee and poop.

Marla is in deep sleep when Corrie picks her up. Today it takes a half hour to get the baby to her breast, yet Mom is persistent and uncomplaining. Wanting to reinforce the doctor’s orders, I encourage Corrie and wait patiently for an opportunity to guide this new mom.

When I visit two-week-old Marla a second time, I learn that the baby has gained back her birth weight and that the doctor is pleased. Corrie excitedly tells me all about her doctor’s visit, then glances at the clock. Two hours have passed since the last feeding. “When can I stop this?” she finally asks.

“Now,” I reply. “Let’s watch Marla and see when she’s ready to eat. If she gets to the third hour, we’ll wake her up.”

Mom looks like a weight has fallen off her shoulders. She sits back, and we wait and watch together. In half an hour Marla wiggles and squirms, wakes up and actively looks for Mom. Corrie happily picks her up and nurses with confidence.

Just in time for the busy Easter holiday, I talk to Corrie about The HUG SOSs (Signs of Over-Stimulation). Mom now understands new ways of knowing when Marla has had enough excitement, as well as how to comfort the baby. By Monday Corrie is beaming as she describes her ability not only to see those SOS but also to respond by retreating for a few minutes while she and baby regroup. We all agree, “We sure do love The HUG!”

Local Health Department Experiences The HUG!

2010-05-05T23:10:00.003-04:00

See what they have to say about this training.

"I love, but do NOT like my baby!"

2010-04-11T22:14:00.000-04:00

I was rather shocked by the perspective of the young mother referred by my colleague, Gale. "Gale thought you could help me out," the young woman explains.

Eli was Samantha's second baby. He was a planned child, born healthy and full term. Labor and delivery had gone well, breastfeeding was successful, and Mom had two months of maternity leave. What could be that wrong? I wonder.

"He fusses all the time!" Samantha explains as she lays the baby on the exam table. "See, like now! Hear him making all those grumpy sounds!"

Eli is a robust, wide-eyed six-week-old. He is very busy in his movements as he wiggles and squirms on the exam table. His level of activity is a wonder to behold. He seems to wind up a second, then one arm shoots out to the side, both legs kick upward, and he arches his back. He is also very busy with his vocalizing—a grunt here, a groan there, or was that a coo? (See DVD...) The activity and sounds coming from his cute little body are normal and even entertaining to me. But his activity level and his vocalizing seem to be off-putting to his mother who thinks Eli is fussing all the time.

"See Sarah there," Samantha says as she points to her four-year-old daughter coloring peacefully on the floor at our feet. "She is so calm and easy to be around. Both my husband and I had alcoholic parents, and we promised each other that we would have a peaceful household. But Eli just keeps on fussing," the new mother remarks as she hands me her baby.

Samantha is describing a temperament difference in her children. The work by Thomas and Chess in the mid and late 1950's was important in confirming what all grandmas know: babies are born different one from another! Some are quiet and laid back, while another is busy and rather demanding. One is predictable while another is a surprise every minute. An parent's own temperament makes it easier to "hang" with one kind of child than another. Certainly issues in a parent's own upbringing also impact their ease (or not) with a certain style or temperament. If a parent misunderstands a child's temperament and misinterprets their intention, problems in the developing paren-child relationship can begin and esculate.

What an opportunity and a challenge this moment is! Can I help this mother see her son through a different lens? As usual, when I feel challenged by a patient encounter, I simply look to the behavior of the baby (The HUG Strategies "See and "Share"). I demonstrate Eli's normal reflexes and get excited when he brings his hand to his mouth and begins to calm down. I pick up the end of my red stethoscope and engage the baby in a little game of following its movement with his eyes. Of course, I finish with the grand finale of having the mother call out the baby's name. Eli hesitates only a moment before he turns toward his mother and—I believe he actually gives her a wink!

Samantha giggles and scoops up the baby from my arms as I discuss this high, but normal, level of activity and vocalizing. We talk about how each baby has a special temperament and style, right from birth. "His body activity and enjoyment of vocalizing are part of Eli's inborn personality," I explain. Mom smiles as she gives him a hug. “I guess he’s just a real go-getter,” she responds.

Eli is three years old now. Every time he and his family come to the clinic to see Gale, they stop by and say hello to me. "Eli's not really fussy anymore," Samantha explains. "But he's still a busy and noisy little guy!" Eli runs down the hall ahead of his mom who laughs out loud as his sister squeals in his pursuit

Read other articles on understanding and care of babies.
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© HUG Your Baby 2010

"This won't really hurt your baby."-- Lying to Parents or NOT

2010-03-31T23:30:00.003-04:00

I had an important experience this week with a mom and her newborn who needed blood drawn.

The kind lab lady "reassured" mom and her older daughter that "this won't really hurt the baby. He will fuss because he doesn't like being held down." I then watched as the baby at first cried, then sent out major SOSs(Signs of Over-Stimulation) with rapid breathing and tremors, and then shut down TOTALLY. He went pale, limp, and his color was in between green and tan. The mother held the baby's other hand talking sweetly. The older sister looked on -- horrified. I could imagine her thinking, "I wonder what it feels like when it REALLY hurts?" I realized then, it was not ok to lie to families about the distress we cause their loved ones.

So I've been thinking about how to tell the truth. How does this sound? Next time I will say.

"We've talked for quite a while and you understand why we need to do this blood test. We will be an gentle as possible but this will hurt your baby like it would hurt you to have your blood drawn. Your baby will cry. Some babies have the capacity after crying to withdraw into a trance when they are over stressed. He may go from crying to looking really dazed and out of it. Afterwards it will take him a while to be himself again. For an hour or so he may be extra tired and not want to eat. But your love and attention will help him feel comforted again and show him you are always there for him no matter what."

What do you think about this explanation? Several NICU nurses are especially interested in how we might share SOS information with new parents. Telling the truth with kindness and support seems like a step in the right direction. Please contact me if you have experience or ideas which will help us share The HUG information with the vulnerable babies (and their parents) we serve.

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© HUG Your Baby 2010

Nationally Recognized Author Applauds The HUG DVD!

2010-03-20T23:04:00.010-04:00

Rose St. John, author of Fathers at Birth: Your Role in Bringing Your Child into the World reviews The HUG DVD.

"Jan Tedder’s DVD, The Hug: Understanding the Secret Language of a Newborn is a truly wonderful video for parents of newborns. The video addresses three essentials that new parents deal with: How can I calm my baby? How can I help my baby eat and sleep well? How can I play with my baby so she can grow and learn? Tedder clearly depicts three main “Zones” that babies display: sleepy (Resting Zone), awake (Ready Zone), fussy (Rebooting Zone). She then demonstrates how parents can work with each “Zone” to address their baby’s current needs by offering simple and effective strategies that work! Her approach is clear and accessible. This information is so, so necessary for new Moms and Dads! I highly recommend this video."

Listen to a reading of Fathers at Birth

Click here for more information on Fathers at Birth: Your Role in Bringing Your Child into the World

© HUG Your Baby 2010

7-Month-Old Nurses All Night!

2010-03-18T09:11:00.002-04:00

This is NOT A DRAMATIZATION!

This lovely 7-month-old nurses during each nap and all night long. Mothers in such a situation are at risk for giving up breastfeeding as well as for experiencing significant strain on personal and family life. Learn to help moms solve this all-too-common problem.

How to watch a YouTube movie: Click the PLAY button, then click PAUSE. Allow the light pink line to traverse across the bar. When you click PLAY again, the movie should play without stops and starts.

See previous blog for solution to this problem!

See previous blog for solution to this problem!

"She only sleeps when she's latched on!" the desparate mom says.

2010-03-18T08:51:00.005-04:00

Perry (the mom on the left) recently moved to this area, and is desperate for support in getting her daughter to nap and sleep without being attached to the breast. “I am depressed and do not feel like a very good mom,” she says. “I have failed my little girl who suffers every time I am not available.” Perry explains that early on she relished the closeness and connection that came with snuggling and nursing her baby during naps and bedtime. But at seven months her daughter needs to have mom's nipple in her mouth during EVERY nap and ALL NIGHT LONG! Mom is beginning to resent her daughter and knew something has to change.

READ ON...

Breastfeeding works! See it to believe it!

2010-03-11T12:19:00.003-05:00

Author, Laura Keegan, RN, FNP brings us a new, lovely vision of breastfeeding working! In Breastfeeding with Comfort and Joy there is written advise on getting started, the importance of skin-to-skin, and how positioning and posture impact breastfeeding. Attention is then given to solving the breastfeeding challenges new moms face as well as addressing The Twin Experience.

But, most of all I LOVE THE PICTURES! These colorful, touching, and intimate photos communicate that women can and will be successful breastfeeding (sometimes with a little help) and that babies love it!

I'm not the only one who thinks this book is swell.

"Breastfeeding with Comfort and Joy is magnificent. It's like having a wise and loving grandmother show you exactly how to nurse your baby."

— Christiane Northrup, MD,
author of Women's Bodies, Women's Wisdom

"I didn't know my baby was a REAL person," the young dad says.

2010-02-28T18:28:00.007-05:00

My friend teaches a wonderful childbirth education classes but ask me to cover "The Newborn" one evening while she is out of town. Though this class has traditionally been used to teach how to diaper a baby or give a bath, I decide to take a different approach.

"Tonight we will discuss learning to read your baby's body language," I explain.

"You might say we're gonna learn to talk Baby Talk!" I say as I turn on The HUG Your baby DVD. "Let's learn about three newborn Zones (Resting, Ready, & Rebooting Zone) and a newborn’s SOSs (Signs of Over-Stimulation)."

Together we watch as a baby sends out a Body SOS with changes in his color, movement, and breathing. One Dad-to-be is especially excited about those Behavioral SOSs: Spacing Out, Switching Off, & Shutting Down.

“I never knew babies were REAL PEOPLE!” he exclaims at the end of the DVD.

I am curious to see if this view of the infant as a REAL person, ready and able to communicate, might spark questions about how birthing choices effect that baby. I review information on natural oxytocin and adrenaline and its influences on the newborn's ability to be alert at birth. We then consider the impact of birthing interventions on the newborn. I suddenly see a sparkle in the eyes of one pregnant woman. "I can't wait to get to know my baby! I want to do all I can to help her come into this world ready to communicate with me!"

This evening I experience the magic of childbirth education. Tonight several young couples understand that one's choices about giving birth are in fact a choice about parenting. Including information of reading a baby's body language in childbirth education class helps these parents take a big step toward being the good moms and dads they want to be!

Read other articles on understanding and care of babies.
Learn about resources for parents and traing for professionals who serve expectant and new parents.
© HUG Your Baby 2010

Mom Doesn't Notice That SOS.

2010-02-23T19:40:00.004-05:00

The new mother had attended a HUG Your Baby class several week ago where I had discussed newborn body language. She was here in my office for a brief weight check on her baby boy who wore the cutest fireman onesie. Mom is in bliss -- enjoying every moment of the newborn's life. "I never knew I could be so in love," she confesses as she glances down at her daughter.

Her husband shifts from one foot to the other when these words are spoken. He finally breaks into a big smile. "Can't beat THIS competition", he says as he reaches down to adjust the baby's tiny hat.

I asked if the parents had noticed any of those SOS (Signs of Ocer-Stimulation) we had discussed in the childbirth education class. "Remeber that "Shutting Down" or that "Switching Off?" I ask. "That's when babies look away when they are a bit overstimulated."

"No", mom says. "Susie seems just able to handle anything."

Just about that time I glance down at Susie on her mom's lap. As the parents talk, Susie clearly turns her head to the side in an apparent effort to keep herself under control as the lively conversation about her proceeds.

I am amazed as usual. One mom see this "Shutting Down" or "Switching Off" behavior and worry that "my baby doesn't like me." Another mother (like this one) does not even notice this behavior because she is so attached and engrossed in her newborn's every moment. Clearly, "a face does NOT say it all." What is upsetting to one mom is not noticed by another.

It seems important to teach ALL new moms the meaning of behavior. Then the mom who carries some insecurity or has a baby who does not connect as effortlessly will not take this commmunication as "Proof that I'm a bad mom."

As the literature suggest, moms at high risks have more positive response to effective intervention than do moms (like this) at lower risk. But since all moms deserve to feel their best about their new baby, let's just GIVE A HUG TO THEM ALL!

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© HUG Your Baby 2010

Giving The HUG!

2010-02-16T12:23:00.005-05:00

Tara, the public health nurse, arrived for her first home visit with Sherri, a brand new mom. Sherri is 21 years old, lives with her parents, and is a new single mom. Her baby was born full term and healthy. Sherri claims to "know nothing about babies" but glows with that enthusiasm (and rush of adrenalin) mother nature bestows on new parents.

Tara glances down at her forms from the health department. Wow, there is so much that could be covered at this important first visit. Do you have enough oil for your furnace? Do you know about back-to-sleep? Did you start your birth control pills? Did you know that babies can see your face? Tara's head spins as she wonders where to start.

Last week Tara completed The HUG continuing education class at her health department and is excited to integrate this information into her already busy schedule. She remembers that the teacher, Jan, said, "If you ever feel confused about what to do next, just See and Share." Jan explained that Seeing the baby's behavior and Sharing that behavior with parents can create an important connection with new parents.

But first, Tara must "See". She worked hard at the workshop to gain new knowledge and skills in observing and interacting with newborns. She glances over at Sherri's son, Freddie, and remarks, "Oh, I see he's in the Ready Zone. He looks ready to play with us."

Tara's right. Freddie's eyes are bright, his body is rather still, and his breathing is calm and regular. As his mother reaches for her Diet Coke, Freddie follows her with his eyes.

"Oh, I see that he is watching you right now," Tara exclaims. Sherri notices what Tara means and quickly joins the game. She tilts her head slowly in the other direction, and Freddie tracks right after her. "You nosey little man!" Sherri laughs as she picks up her son.

About that time Tara notices Freddie start to change. His eyes drift down, away from his mother's face, and he gets a bit pale. His chin tremors and his body stiffens a bit. "Oh, do you think I've bored him already?" Sherri asks.

But Tara is quick to remember what she just learned from class. "Oh, no," she gently explains. "Freddie is just showing a little SOS, or Sign of Over-Stimulation. That's really normal for new babies. Hey, let's swaddle him a minute and see what happens."

Sherri had become an expert on swaddling in the hospital, so she confidently wraps her little one up. She is surprised to see that in this swaddled position, Freddie is able to look back toward his mother; he even turns in her direction when she whispers his name.

"Wow, you're so smart! I'm going to take take super-good care of you!" she giggles. Sherri cuddles her baby as Tara covers a few of the important questions on her form. Seeing and Sharing this baby's behavior created that kind of teachable moment that every nurse longs for!

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© HUG Your Baby 2011

The HUG Strategies in Action!

2010-02-13T18:54:00.000-05:00

How to watch a YouTube movie: Click the PLAY button, then click PAUSE. Allow the light pink line to traverse across the bar. When you click PLAY again, the movie should play without stops and starts. Click four red arrows in right corner for full screen.

Tug-of-War between Mom and Dad

2010-02-03T21:16:00.000-05:00

Eight-day-old Tabitha is calm at the beginning of her visit with me, but as I undress her she starts to rev up. At first her hands shake, then her chin trembles and her face gets red. Her face now "clouds over" as she stares out into space. (See SOS "Sign of Over-Stimulation.) When I persist with undressing her, she starts to cry. I lean over Tabitha and softly call out her name. "Tabitha can you calm yourself down?" The baby clearly hesitates a moment when she hears my voice but then starts to cry again.

I finish the undressing and lay her back down on the table to listen to her heart sounds. She clouds over again when the stethoscope touches her chest, and once again begins again to cry. Dad scoops her up in his arms just as Mom mimics my earlier action by leaning forward to softly call her baby's name. I am witnessing one of the lovely adventures of early parenthood, the tug-of-war between parents who both are wanting so passionately to bond for their new baby.

Remembering what he learned about the "Rebooting Zone," Dad rocks her a moment which clearly comforts the baby. Mom presses on with her insistent, soft, sing-songly voice. Dad finally sighs with a smile as he hands the baby carefully over to his wife's arms. "Mom always has that magic touch."

Today's fathers are often (and preferably) involved in the decision to plan a baby, participate in the OB visit, help select the baby's new doctor, and often attend the well baby visits. Expectant parents anticipate that they will feel some competition with the mother-in-law who arrives at the child's birth, the older sister who stays a week to help out, or the doula who shows up for a shift or two. But as new parents they do not expect to feel competition between one another as they strive to care for their baby.

Research on new parenthood suggest that this competition is normal and, in fact, can fuel the attachment process of a parent to his/her child. However, if these feelings are not understood and appreciated for what they contribute to the developing parent-child relationship, such competition can undermine the parent's relationship with one another.

"I love to see you both working so hard to get to know and to care for your new baby," I say. "Some new parents even confess to a little competition with each other during the first few days of their baby's life."

Dad jokingly "complains" that "Mom has the breast which always trump what I can do!" But Mom quickly explains that "But Dad can swaddle and comfort Tabitha like nobody else!" Knowing this struggle is normal and healthy can actually bring couples closer together in these first precious days.

Babies quickly learn to attach to both parents and by their behavior "say" I know the difference between mom and Dad. How lucky is any newborn whose parents finds themselves in this tug-of-war (with themselves and each other) to be the best parent they can each be!

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© HUG Your Baby 2010

Mary Rose Tully - an inspiration to us all!

2010-02-02T00:42:00.003-05:00

Thirty years ago I was working at Wake Health Services, a community health center, in Apex, NC where I provided classes for pregnant and young mothers. We had a breastfeeding rate of about 1% so there was lots of room for improvement. I figured the breast had just not yet been discovered in Apex - well, not the breast that could feed a baby anyway!

Even then Mary Rose was known as the "Breast Lady" working at Wake Medical Center in Raleigh. She came to the Apex community Center to teach the small gathering of young mothers-to-be. I asked Mary Rose if she planned to do a presentation on why breastfeeding was important. She explained that her approach was just to show how to do it. So there she was with her baby doll moving in all directions as she demonstrated the various positions to make it happen. She laid on the floor, (pretending to be resting at home) she sat in a chairs (pretending to be at a gathering with friends), and she stood by the door (implying a woman could pay for her groceries while continuing to breastfeed.) It was all very discrete. A pink blanket lay over her shoulder and the baby doll.

I guess some of the teaching "took." A couple of those moms gave breastfeeding a try. I certainly did when my babies arrived a few years later.

Mary Rose Tully passed away on January 20, 2010. She introduced our state and much of our country to the best of the breast. She mentored me and others along the way and taught us to never lose site of what was best for mom and baby. It was a blessing to know her and grow from her experience, passion, and knowledge. She will be missed. Every baby I help to her mom's breast will honor this lovely and dynamic soul!

Correction to previous blog

2010-01-31T12:24:00.006-05:00

CORRECTION regarding my blog, "When news doesn't cover the news" posted Oct 3, 2009:

In the following article I erroneously credited Victoria Macioce-Stumpf for writing this article. She graciously informed me that credit goes to the CIMS organization and specifically the work of author, Nicette Jukelevics. We all certainly appreciate the wonderful work by the CIMS organization and applaud all they do to keep us informed - including letting us know when we mis-step!

CORRECTION regarding my blog, "When news doesn't cover the news" posted Oct 3, 2009:

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© HUG Your Baby 2009

7-month-old Nursing All Night

2010-01-30T12:50:00.004-05:00

New HUG Teacher Makes a Real Difference in Mom's (& baby's) Sleep!

2010-01-28T19:55:00.011-05:00

Sarah McKay is a recent graduate of the Certified HUG Teacher training. Sarah works as a doula near Nashville, TN where she is eager to share her new HUG skills and knowledge with new moms and dads! She describes a recent home visit with a brand new mom and her baby.

"I arrived at Traci's house for a postpartum visit after the birth of her daughter two weeks prior. The birth had been a beautiful drug-free birth, and when I had left her just 2 hours after the birth, her daughter was already breastfeeding like a champ.

At this postpartum visit we talked about how she and her baby were doing. Her biggest concern was that, "My baby is not sleeping well". As we talked, I watched the little one start to squirm. Traci explained, “I just nursed her and laid her down 30 minutes ago. Look at her squirm and wiggle. Sometimes her eyes flash open, and she even makes some sounds.”

Traci's remarks were no surprise to me. I convinced this new mom to sit and watch her baby a moment. And as she and I continued to talk, Molly transitioned from the "active sleep" back into her "deep sleep" state I had learned about in my HUG training. Traci looked amazed. This was the perfect opportunity to explain to this new mom the different sleep states, and also about the three Newborn Zone, "The Resting, Ready, and Rebooting Zone". Sharing the HUG information gave this new mom and baby just what they needed – more than 30 minutes of uninterrupted rest!"

© HUG Your Baby 2010

7 Ways Dads Can Bond With Their Baby That Don’t Involve A Bottle

2010-01-26T20:02:00.004-05:00

The Natural Parenting Tips Blog has some great ideas...

"One of the arguments I hear from so many moms as to why they have to give up breastfeeding, is that Dad feels left out. As my other half mentioned in another post, the one thing that Dads have no real place in, is breastfeeding. There are so many other ways to bond with your baby, that feeding is a moot point. And really Mom’s job.

Bath your baby. Better still, bath with your baby. Co-Bathing and showering saves water, and gives you some lovely skin to skin bonding time.
Massage your baby. You can learn infant massage from a certified instructor, or from a DVD. Massaging your baby is soothing for both of you, and really beneficial for your tot.
Wear your baby – Baby wearing isn’t just for moms. Babies like the sound of Dad’s heartbeat too. Invest in a good quality baby carrier (Such as an Ergo) and enjoy the benefits as your baby sleeps, observes, and snuggles in nice and close.

Using the HUG Strategies: A HUG Story

2010-01-19T11:34:00.003-05:00

Guest Author: Doula & Certified HUG Teacher, Joanne Dahill

2010-01-14T22:04:00.005-05:00

Joanne has just completed the HUG Teacher Certification and was eager to share one of her HUG experiences.

"I recently attended a wonderful home birth in a small community south of the Triangle. The new mother and father were well supported by extended family, but had not been able to attend any classes in preparation for their new responsibilities as parents.

When I returned for the 24 hour visit I had the opportunity to answer many questions regarding what is normal for a newborn. Towards the end of the visit we all sat down and watched the H.U.G.Your Baby DVD with plenty of pauses for more questions and observation of the beautiful little boy in our midst.

I returned for one last visit, a little over 2 weeks later. It is natural for parents to build confidence in their parenting skills over time and that was certainly the case here. This mom repeatedly mentioned how much the information she had received during our last visit had allowed her to confidently care for her baby. In particular she enjoyed the fact that she could watch for the active sleep cycles that would occur near the time for a feeding so that she could gently rouse him and bring him easily to the breast. She spoke so proudly as she said she was able to attend to his needs and that he rarely cried to signal hunger. In fact at that point he rarely cried at all. I reminded her of the crying chart…there would likely be some tears ahead. But with her ability to pay attention to his S.O.S.signals and sleep cycles she felt confident that she could minimize his distress and enjoy him to the maximum!"

Congratulations, Joanne. Thanks for Giving A HUG to Your Community.

"I feel more confident as a new parent."

2010-01-08T05:37:00.002-05:00

Misunderstanding newborn behavior is known to negatively impact breastfeeding, parent confidence, and parent-child bonding. Doulas, nurses, and childbirth educators are in a prime position to provide effective education to parents. Use The HUG to help parents prevent and solve common but important problems around a baby's eating, sleeping, crying, and attachment.

"Creating and Marketing Your Birth Related Business!" - an interview with the author

2009-12-10T23:38:00.003-05:00

Why Love Matters

2009-11-26T14:04:00.004-05:00

Guest author: James G. Henderson, Ph.D., Carolina Friends School, Durham, NC, USA

Why Love Matters (Routledge, 2004) gets my vote as the most important book of the twenty-first century. Not only does author Sue Gerhardt make a compelling case for the importance of nurture in the first year of life; she also writes in a style crafted carefully to appeal to professional and lay readers alike.

Much has been learned about brain function in the last twenty years, and Gerhardt thoroughly examines this body of knowledge to identify vital information for parents, pediatric specialists, and policymakers to absorb. Nobody doubts that babies are precious, but Gerhardt persuasively demonstrates just how much individuals, families, and societies depend on successful early parenting.

“Babies come into the world with a need for social interaction to help develop and organize their brains. If they don’t get enough empathic, attuned attention—in other words, if they don’t have a parent who is interested in them and reacting positively to them—than important parts of their brain simply will not develop as well.”

Devoted, consistent attention is what babies need to thrive. Love is communicated to a baby who is tenderly held, smiled at, talked to, and played with attentively. Babies who do not benefit from such loving attention are at high risk for emotional, educational, and health challenges in the years that follow. Societies that do not support early parenting do so at their own peril. As Gerhardt suggests, improving “the relationship between parents and their babies is a much more cost effective (and less painful) way of improving mental health than any number of adult therapeutic treatments.”

The United States faces a crisis in the parenting of babies and young children. Due to changes in the proximity of extended family and greater demands on adults of both genders to prioritize work life, today’s babies are at risk. Too many parents are too busy and too poorly informed about how to parent a baby. Common but critical problems related to eating, sleeping, and crying, and to parent-child attachment, can derail a family already under stress. If not properly addressed, such problems can alter the developmental trajectories of children. Moreover, as greater and greater economic pressure is placed on healthcare and early childhood education dollars, professionals who serve these families practice under the weight of ever-increasing responsibilities.

Why Love Matters makes a strong case for the importance of helping new moms and dads understand and respond effectively to their babies. Programs such as Gerhardt’s own OXPIP program in the UK, and Jan Tedder’s HUG Your Baby program in the US, are able to offer parents precisely this kind of guidance. Why Love Matters boldly suggests that the future of the next generation may depend on the success of such programs.

Read other articles on understanding and care of babies.
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© HUG Your Baby 2009

U.S. Earns a "D" on 2009 Preterm Birth Report Card

2009-11-24T23:18:00.006-05:00

"U.S. Earns a Disappointing "D" on 2009 Preterm Birth Report Card
For the second year in a row, the United States has received a "D" on the March of Dimes Premature Birth Report Card, reflecting the fact that more than half a million American newborns did not get a healthy start in 2009. This year seven states improved their status by one letter grade on the March of Dimes annual report, while two states fell in performance. As in 2008, no state earned an "A," and Vermont earned the lone "B." The good news? Criteria affecting preterm birth did improve in many states. For example, 27 states, the District of Columbia, and Puerto Rico lowered their late preterm birth rates. A significant number of states also reduced their percentages of women of childbearing age who smoke and the percentage of women of childbearing age who are uninsured. Grades for the report are determined by comparing preterm birth rates to the national Healthy People 2010 preterm birth objective, which is 7.6 percent of all live births. Read more..."

Published in:
Preemie Matters Newsletter Nov. 2009
A resource from the National Healthy Mothers, Healthy Babies Coalition

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